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Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 8
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Junior Member
Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 8 |
I will be wary. Thank you for your story.
My wife and I are in our mid 40's. We dated starting in college. Counting dating, we have been together for 25 years.
I found out from the OM's wife that my WW and OM never planned on leaving their families, they were just going to have this affair in addition to their current families - how noble and selfish, right?
I also forgot to mention something. My wife never goes on business trips, but 6 months ago was mentioning that she might be going on one. It would be for a week, and would have been with the OM - red alert!
When the trip was to have happened, I asked her what happened. WW said she decided to not go - I verified this with her co-workers. This also gives me hope that WW was pulling back from the relationship and the OM was becoming jealous.
I know I need to stay vigilant - especially as both my children get older and move on in their life - then it will be just WW and myself.
I have found all the stories and advice from this site extremely helpful!
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 6,108
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 6,108 |
If you and WW have not done so yet, I suggest you both get tested for STDs. That OM was looking for easy and convenient...he could have been having sex with other OW. APs often do not use protection and will lie about it.
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 8
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 8 |
That is a good idea. I will schedule an appointment today.
WW said they used condom's sometimes, but not always.
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Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,964 Likes: 1
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Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,964 Likes: 1 |
Numb.
In some counties you can get checked at the public health dept. for free.
God Bless
Gamma
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Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 8
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 8 |
The OM lives 45 minutes away. The OM's wife said they were going to move.
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Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,964 Likes: 1
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Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,964 Likes: 1 |
Numb,
One other point, perhaps already mentioned, is that the people who knew about the affair or supported the affair can no longer be a part of your or your Ws life. In particular you wrote in your first post, sometimes at a female friend�s apartment , this female friend of your W's has to go, with a formal do not contact ever again by any means letter.
God Bless
Gamma
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 968 Likes: 1
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Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 968 Likes: 1 |
^Agree with that. Enablers of an affair can be crucial to maintaining its survival, even after exposure. They are like poison in the well.
Happily remarried to wonderful woman who I found using the guidelines in "Buyers, Renters, Freeloaders" 2 baby boys, working on #3 and couldn't ask for anything more. When my ex's affair happened: BH 28, Ex-WW:29 Married: 7 years Together: 8 years D-day: 10/5/2014 D filed: 1/22/2015 D Final: 6/4/2015 My story
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