Also, dry the hair with a t-shirt or micro-fiber cloth. Regular terry cloth tends to make hair frizzy. T-shirts are my favorite.

You dry it by scrunching up the curls, never pulling them down, or putting the hair up in a towel like you see in the ads.

Also, getting a good diva cut really helps. You can find a stylist by googling Divacurl and they have a stylist finder. I've had to go through a few, but now I have a woman that I love.

The hair in the back is shorter in chunks (not the straight hair layers - that doesn't work for curly girls) and it lightens up the curls so there are curls all the way down the back and not just that stupid A shape curly girls have come to dread. (Think Rosanna Rosanna Danna)

They push a ton of product. That worked for me for a while, but the smell and scalp issue was the end of that.

I get it cut two to three times a year, so yes, it costs a lot per time, but not terrible over all because it is so rare.

Okay, I need to go clean my apartment!

Brylocream is good for hair management too

Do they still make that?

That and petroleum jelly were what I used in early grammar school, lol.

LTL

Yes, it is endorsed by the Art of Manliness also. That's where I learned about it.
It has a nice menthol scent and costs very little compared to modern hair products. Sometimes it's hard to find in drug stores because they don't keep it near the modern hair stuff.

Isn't that more along the lines of smothering, lol!


Seriously, I save hundreds by not using all those products. Coconut oil also makes good deodorant, without any aluminum.

I'm not asking that much in FS because I'm so frugal.

I can't resist....

Did you see Night at the Museum 3?

Hehe...no unfortunately. I have a three year old, so I never see movies anymore, but I am sure it's funny. : )

It's a family movie, mostly... but if you saw it, you would laugh.

It's been four months since the divorce was final and I cannot believe how much better I feel. I don't really miss the xH, although sometimes I do think about him. Not very often, and mostly in disbelief at the whole thing.

Six more weeks of crazy and then I'm done with school. Feels great.

I posted on my Facebook page an article about Meryl Streep funding a filmmaking lab for women over forty. I realized after posting it, that there is some pressure to not associate with that because then I'd be considered 'old'. Whatever. That is part of the shaming in this society for women and I feel quite done with it. I'm proud of my life and my experiences.

I've been waffling about my name. I feel some pressure to revert back to my maiden name, but for some reason I don't want to. I feel I 'should' want to. But I don't. It seems like going backwards in my life. Has anyone dealt with this here? It's just a curious place to be.

Not much else new. Pretty happy these days. Looking forward to getting a haircut and lots of sleep and self care in the near future. This has been an excellent adventure but I'm really for a break.

This quarter my film will premier at the film festival, they are producing a one-act play of mine and will be reading a ten minute one at a different festival. I've written eight scripts and four plays in two years. Wow. This has been a phenomenal growing experience.

I feel bad about the marriage ending, but it had so since there was no room for me in there. It could have continued if I had been willing to sacrifice everything else for what he wanted, but I need more. POJA includes careers for both people they like, as long as they supports the marriage, right? I'm down for that.

But I'm not in a hurry either.

I went back to my maiden name right away, because I expected to remarry at some point, and whether I changed my name in the future or not, I didn't want that remarriage to be the time when the kids and I parted names. It always rubbed my the wrong way when women did that.

I like how you're taking your time. And I'm trying the water only thing, so far so good

Interesting take on the names. I never thought of it that way.

Taking thing slow feels right. Glad that's working out for you too!

I have kept my married surname because it's easier with the children and I didn't feel compelled to change it. If I ever re-marry I may have to rethink this though. It sort of bothers me that I would sign a marriage license/certificate with my married name and use it on wedding invitations. Maybe the wedding invitations could just use first names but the marriage license/certificate would require my legal name.

I never changed my name, which I realize now is a very renter thing to do, but it makes things easier now. I used his name informally hyphenated with mine though, so its all over the place when you google my name for my publications.

I kept the last name I took in marriage.
I had it as long as my maiden and it IS me.

I joke with people that the long marriage was all part of an "elaborate plan to acquire the last name.....all along."

lol

Ditto. I didn't see that I should give up anything more than I already had. Maybe it is silly but I also kind of smiled that any future wife of his would see my last name is the same as hers but I'm the original and the one with the kids lol. I don't think that today but the fact is that IS my name and I am only going to change it if I want to and I didn't...nor wanted to go through all the hassle of changing it.


LOL

My married surname is also easy. People always screw up the pronunciation of my maiden name.

You know what I think is funny? When the WW keeps the last name.

My WH's former (yes, former because he is mad at WH) best friend got divorced from his WW and it was a short marriage like mine (5 years). She was a serial cheater during that time and kept his last name. I found it very weird. Like, you must not care about this guy AT ALL, but yet you want to keep his name. Waywards do the darndest things.

Wow, this is exactly how I felt, but without the kids part. Exactly.



Neither one of my names is good for that, but my married name is more unique. I think I'll keep it.

Deleted two more mutual friends (enabler couple) on Facebook this morning when a picture showed up of the H wearing a beard just like my xH. I don't need that info or the reminder. Ba-bye. Should have done it months ago, but she did send me a good list of local attorneys when I needed one, so I felt some loyalty. Or perhaps guilt. No more.

I recently had to cut off an enabling ex in-law family.
The thing with enablers is that you don't need to worry about upsetting them because their priority is enabling the bad behavior anyway. They just make excuses to you.

Yes, enablers are the worst. I continued the purge today and it feels good.

There are definitely a lot of people with some very bad ideas about boundaries.