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Joined: Oct 1999
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BUTTER TIME? <BR> W called today and conversation was good at first and went downhill when I mentioned a Christian counselor I met that she should go to. W said, " I don't have time for that SH** right now" (Her father is terminal with cancer).<BR> We lightened up a little and I said, "Do you want to get together for lunch?" W said, " No, not right now , I mean, I don't think so right now" <BR> Then W suddenly said " I have to go and take the dog out now" . I said, OK call me back, W said "NO I'M NOT CALLING YOU BACK, I TOLD YOU MY CELL PHONE IS ALMOST DEAD!!!" I said "OK see you later" W said same. End of conversation.<P> About an hour later W called back and apologized saying " Sorry I was so abrupt" I didn't mean it that way" (I think she's PMSing) She told me about her fears about her father and we remembered when my F died in 95. She is in a lot of pain right now. <P> Then I'm not sure HOW we got on the subject but she brought up the fact that Women's lib really confused women. <BR> How WAY back women would wear their hair up and took their hair down at night only for their husbands eyes. Even wore long dresses so the only one who EVER saw their legs were their husbands.<BR> I said I how when I met her that I thought she was a throw-back woman that would have those type of feeling for her husband. W said "I am but things got messed up" " I used to wait for you to open the car door but...." <BR> I said I wondered why women changed. W said "They wanted more" I said " I a LOT of ways they ended up with LESS" W agreed. I told her I wanted to honor and cherish her that way but she has always had a HARD time letting me. (W SAID NOTHING) I told her she has this "Independent Front" W said "I had to develop this to survive in this world" I told her "Honey, you don't need that front with me" (W said nothing) <P> We talked for about 10 min more and when W's voice was sweet again I said " Honey, why don't we spend some time together? " What do you do all day anyway? Hang around his (OM's) office all day?" "That has to be boring" " Let's just have some fun together" W said " Your not going to give me a headache are you?" I said "I won't as long as you don't give me a A** ache [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com] " W laughed and said OK. " I promised NO US TALK just time together" I suggested we go to Boston to the Flower Exchange to get some dry flowers for her to make wreaths with.<BR> I asked "When's good for you" W said "Wednesday's OK, but maybe tomorrow."<BR> We talked some more and I had to go to take our dog to his groomers appointment.<P> She's always trying to avoid spending ANY TIME with me because we get close. This is the first time in a month that we are getting together just to "Get together" The last time she made me promise "NO US TALK" it was HER that spilled her guts saying she knows she made a mistake and wanted to work out our problems but.... "You have NO IDEA t how DEEP the hole I dug myself is" "It's not as easy as you think to get out of" That was a month ago and she's since passed it off as "Getting caught up in the emotion of our son's wedding" (COP OUT) So, when we go to Boston, NO LBs NO US TALK (unless W brings it up again) AND hopefully..... BUTTER....<P>------------------<BR>desperate<BR>"If yesterday didn't stop today, Why should TODAY stop tomorrow??" <BR>"Wisdom is why!!"<P>

Joined: Jun 1999
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PH,<BR>Sounds like you are on the right track !<P>Go just have fun tommorrow !<P>BEst of luck and God Bless!

Joined: Aug 1999
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Ah Frank.... <sigh> that's nice.....<P>Let us know how it goes, of course!!!<P>You're doin' great!!<P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>Marriage: the most important contract you'll ever enter into, and the most sacred.<P><BR>

Joined: Oct 1999
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THANKS RWD AND NB,<BR> Well hopefully SOMETIME this week Tomorrow or Wednesday I'll have some good news.<BR> I forgot W also talked about her moving to CONN. to work near our Niece and "Clear my head" <BR> There is NO WAY OM can follow her there. I am just thankful she is "Thinking" about a LONG way away from OM. (Me too but at least OM will be AS far away!! [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com] )<BR> Wish me luck. Hoping for the best, preparing for the worse. [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com] <P>------------------<BR>desperate<BR>"If yesterday didn't stop today, Why should TODAY stop tomorrow??" <BR>"Wisdom is why!!"<P>

Joined: Jul 1999
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Frank - this sounds pretty good - time together, a little communication. You keep on doing the good thing. I have a feeling it will pay off.<P>Lori

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thanks lori,<BR> Hope today is better for you. [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com] FRANK<P>------------------<BR>desperate<BR>"If yesterday didn't stop today, Why should TODAY stop tomorrow??" <BR>"Wisdom is why!!"<P>


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