ADs are anti depressants.

I was just about to ask you what AD's were.

I'm going to email my lawyer, and ask if being seen privately would be an option.

They tried to make me do mediation and upon advice given me here I asked if we could do separate rooms and they could.

worth asking, you won't be the first.

I just emailed my lawyer with a bunch of questions, and that was the first one. Will let you know what i find out. Thanks for the suggestion!

You need to stop worrying about what possible effects x, y, or z is having on him. It is irrelevant what he thinks.

You do not have to speak to him at all in court but you should be present to hear what is going on. Your lawyer can speak on your behalf. A temporary orders hearing is nothing like mediation and is over relatively quickly.

Yes, This! It doesn't feel like it now, but you may never want to come out of it. Plan B will give you options.

Also a couple of other things--you are going to want to put EPs in place so that you have no idea what is going on in affair land. The internet makes this hard, especially if OW or WH use a lot of social media. Make sure you BLOCK your own access to social media if you have to. I had to do this. I not only deleted facebook, I actually blocked my ability to see instagram, facebook, twitter, tumblr and even MySpace ( yes, MySpace) on my computer and phone ( yes, I think the other woman in my case has narcissistic personality disorder or something. Who has this many social media accounts?). I downloaded parental controls and had my friend password protect it, so I couldn't see anything at all. It sounds drastic, but at one point, I was almost obsessive about checking her instagram even though there wasn't much on it directly about him. But I inferred things and red between the lines. It's best to cut off All modes of information and be drastic about it if you need to. It made me get my head out of the affair. Now even the thought of looking at those things makes my plans sweat. I don't want to know what they are doing and don't care.

PW can you add those tips and how to do em to the How to Plan B correctly thread? The few slips I had were due to social media and I'm sure I'm not the only one....

You got it. Will do it after the park with little PW.

Little piglet! Sweet!

The only social media used is FB, so I guess I better just deactivate it. The only issue I can see is his obsession to our business page, which is created through my personal page. I will not hand it over to him, I can't, but he may throw a stink about that in court. He has been up until I asked for no contact. I know it's only because he wants to manipulate me, because of his overall lack of concern for the business to begin with. If he was so concerned about the business, why wasn't he there running it!!!!!!

Going now to deactivate FB.

THANK YOU!!!!!

Thank you.

And trust me.....this one is pretty dumb! LOL! She's been described as a bi-polar quack! I mean really, who else calls the cops on someone, and ends up getting herself arrested instead! Priceless!

What's Gingers Plan B week look like?

Right now I'm getting prepared to go visit relatives for a couple days. I'm working on finding a job too. Continuing to lose weight, work on me, and get stronger. Once the court hearing is over, I'll know more where things stand, and will decide if I'm going to move or not.

I'm not gonna lie, I'm taking it minute by minute. This still hurts. I took my commitment, love, and wedding vows to that man very seriously, they meant something to me, and it's difficult to just put that aside, in spite of what he's done to me, us, and our business.

Good stuff but try some smaller goals and treats. Funny films get my vote.

Right now I'm just concentrating on reading my book, Surviving and Affair, and that's about all I can handle. I don't know why, but I've been very emotional today.

Something to be thankful for, H made our house payment finally, so I have a place to live for one more month.

Ginger,

You can live in a j ouse for months after the last house payment has been made.

Thank you Jedi_Knight.....that is comforting to know.

Received an email from my lawyer last night, there will be an accounting of the business to see where things stand financially, and we are going to recommend the business be sold. To me, that is the best option, and I hope it goes through. H is not properly managing that business, and I strongly feel the best way to get the free flowing cash out of the POSOW's hands is to end the business. He's enjoyed being her sugar daddy for long enough.

He will be able to return to his old job that he had before we bought the restaurant.

H does blame me for all of this too. I think it's going to be a very long time, if ever, before he can acknowledge his part in all of this mess, and understand why I had to do what I'm doing.

Nobody cares what the drunk guy thinks.


I have to say I agree with selling the restaurant - they practically made it the affair nest and it is forever tainted anyway. Plus it neatly pulls the rug out from under her 'Im the boss fantasy'.

Spending some time with friends this week? Doing anything nice for yourself?