Or just wishful thinking?<P>My Wife called on Sunday, but we weren't home. She left a message & said she received the cards from the kids (didn't say anything about my card, chocolates or music box ). She said she would call back Monday.<P>Well we were all sick & didn't hear the phone ring. She left another message and said she would call back another night. She said, "blah, blah, blah, I love you." She has ALWAYS made it a point to say, "I love you KIDS" and not just, "I love you."<P>Hmmmm?<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html</A>

Maybe a chink in her armour?<BR>Maybe a little guilt is starting to seep in?<BR>Maybe reality has a foot in the door?<P>Keep us posted.<P>SHA

Holy smokes....<P>Chris... is your W really into music boxes too... My W has a collection of about 100+ (I gave her about 90 of them... she took most of them with her though)...<P>and my W is really into chocolates too... Godiva preferably!<P>At least she is calling you( and/or the kids) a couple of times... A total disconnect is a bad sign... building or rebuilding ties are a good sign.<P>Praying for you Chris... <P>Jim

She has never called to talk to me specifically. It has always been the kids & sometimes to talk to me.<P>It wasn't a "real" music box. One they had by the cards. Only cost $4.99. It had a romantic saying on it.<p>[This message has been edited by Chris (CA123) (edited November 09, 1999).]

Chris:<P>For a very long time (probably 10 months), I never received acknowledgement of the cards or gifts I sent. But that doesn't mean they're not noticed. I take it as a victory that I now get thanked for things and I can see they're appreciated. Perhaps your wife is noticing these things too, and when the affair bubble pops, you'll have scored alot of points. I sure hope so.

Chris without sounding glum, I hope my W and I don't get as bad as you have been so unforunate enough to get. I don't know where you draw your "being" from, care to share?<P>She may be seeing a little of what you have known. We will pray for this of course.

Chris --<BR> I would think that it is a very slight positive sign....Hope it's the start of a trend.<P>BTW, I've always wanted to ask you this: Were you born with this much goodness and patience or did you somehow acquire it???<P>Good luck

Distressed, Ah yes, hope. That little tidbit we hold on to.<P>Paul, I draw most of my strength from the ultimate "being" the Lord Jesus. I have to because I'm not getting ANYTHING from her.<BR>Also, I get lots from you people here. Reading many, many books has also helped because they are filled with facts and the fact that affairs end, people have remorse, etc does help.<P>Heartpain, Where was I born? Get this. I was born in Memphis. We were only there for six months and then on to California. My Dad was in the Navy. Now, guess where the om is from and where they are right now? In Arkansas just about 60 miles from Memphis! Small world, eh?<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html</A>

Hi Chris,<BR> How long has it been now? 8 mos.? or 10? .....perhaps paradise is not that wonderful? .....Anyway,you are an amazing person.....Lu

Hi Chris -<P>Yep, quite interesting.....<P>Keep the hope and keep the patience for as long as you can!!<P>How are you all feeling now? <P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

Heavens, Chris, lend me some of your patience!! I sure hope this is a glimmer for you.<P>Lori

Chris,<P>I have to take my hat off to you, if I wore one, I am simply amazed with your determination and the patience of a saint. You are definately THE MAN.<P>If anyone deserves to be happy it is you. I would NOT have been able to take all the [censored] that you have gone through and been able to maintain anything that somewhat resembled sanity. But, somehow you do it.<P>I can only believe that the sunlight of day may be hitting your W. I certainly hope this is the case. Don't lose your perspective. Hang on tight, it's a hell of a ride.<P>If I were you I would take this as a baby step. Nothing Freudian, he was too involved with the mother thing.<P>Wishing us all the Best. <P>Medic

Chris, <P>I look for something in each little word said by my H, too. <P>I really HOPE that she is starting to miss ALL of you. Maybe this time she has been gone has been used to "find" herself. Maybe she is starting to realize that the happiness she is seeking is right with her own dear family that she left behind.<P>My H is 52 and unhappy with life right now. Sometimes I think this whole affair in part has to do with him "looking" for something external to himself for happiness. Hence, since H is unhappy, then our marriage must not have been good or he wouldn't be unhappy, right?!? NO! I think the unhappiness is really INSIDE of them - my H and your W and so many other S of our friends on this board.<P>I hope that our S find out that the happiness is inside them. They don't necessarily need to change marriage partners to find that. I hope time will prove this to my H. Maybe time is already proving this to your W.<P>I hope so....<P>Roll Me Away

Lessee, Found out 25 Dec. She "officialy" left on Feb 17, but she was gone from 1-8 Feb visiting wank boy.<P>She has lived in CO, NC, AR, CO, AR, GA, AR, MD and now back to AR since then. Soon off to somewhere else. (Prayerfully back here without wankboy) Sounds like fun, eh?<P>How am I feeling now? Okay, I guess. Seems like a dream sometimes. Still cannot understand it. 20 years and she just blows it all off.<P>Here's a recap of the kids progress (downhill?).<P>Youngest, age 8. Seems fine. In the summer she wrote a note to the neighbor.<P>"Dear Miss Mary,<BR>I've been spying on you. PLEASE don't call the cops! I love you and even want to have sex with you." A few more lines like this then "Signed your secret admirer" along with a picture of my brother.<P>She was stealing my lighters & starting fires out back. Had to go to a fire safety class. School work was going downhill but is picking up now.<P>Oldest, 14. She was hurt from day one when we told her mom was leaving. She has been arrested for underage drinking (.104 BAC), had to go to Class III alcohol class. Last three years of school she was a 3.85 average. This semester she has two F's, one D, two C's and one B. Now I find a pack of cigarettes n her room with one missing. It was full a week ago & I've been checking it. I found it innocently, not checking up on her. She has missed 16 days of school so far out of 50+ school days.<BR>Took her to a counselor and she told me my daughter is very angry, very hurt & doesn't think she will ever see mom again.<P>I have only talked with my Wife three times since August.<BR>Oh my life is a ball!<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html</A>

I feel somewhat fortunate in that I haven't had to deal with her at all, except for the fact that she left.<P>Couple of things in the last few weeks. Her Mom told her to get back home & fix stuff (as she always does), but she wouldn't here of it.<BR>Her brother is in the hospital, pretty bad. He has psorosis (spelling) of the liver, a really messed up foot & diabetes. Don't know how long he may have, but he should be out today or tomorrow.<BR>Also, it was her birthday last Thursday. With the card my youngest sent her, it may have had an affect. Plus, Christmas is coming up, the youngest has a birthday on 27 Dec, our 20th is 5 January and my birthday is 19 Jan. Hopefully all of this will be enough to shake her loose.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html</A>

Chris, my 14 year old is struggling a lot harder than my 11 year old. That's such a tough age. And so prickly. One moment a child, the next a million years old wondering how they got stuck in "this" household.<P>God bless.<P>------------------<BR>Lor<BR>"Do not get tired of doing what is right, for after awhile you will reap a harvest of blessings if you do not get discouraged and give up. (Gal 6:9)<P>