Have you explained to your lawyer why you need NC? Your lawyer is going to say you have to communicate because it makes your lawyer's job easier. Your lawyer works for you. Why can't the lawyer communicate to your WH's lawyer?

Neither my WH nor I have attys on retainer. My atty just prepares my paperwork and answers questions but he is not in retainer.

So the early resolution management conference papers say we are to meet in person. Email was next best thing with active RO

My WH is certifiable. I got WH tax form...minor form that proves ins...but I had my IM let him know with these 3 options:

1. I will bring it to court.
2. He can come pick it up at my house...outside the gate.
3. He can call the ins company for a copy and I will shred this one.

WH response....Hold onto it.

Why? WTH...is it just to oppose me? What good does it do him or me for me to keep it? Grrrrrrrrrrrr......

I think that's the new Obamacare form that nobody really needs for their taxes...

Anyway he has until 4/15 to file right? I wouldn't worry about it.

I know. But my point is there is no need for him to ask me to hold onto it. We will see each other in court. It's just stupid.

I'm sure you know he's just trying to get a rise out of you, and he is succeeding. So don't fall for it.
You only have a few weeks left anyway.

How did you get the form?

His health insurance company sent it to my house. I'm not sure why...maybe because it was the last known address.

And it was addressed to him? Next time anything addressed to him don't open it and return to sender or forward it to his address.

Yes I will be more cognizant. It's normally just credit card offers that I shred. But I just opened all the mail at once not paying attention...and then I was like...oh crap!

I'm just disgusted with the level of nasty my WH has embraced. It's sad. Thank goodness my IM is unfazed by him. I just don't see why there can't be a level of decorum in sorting out the one issue we have to resolve.

What is wrong with me that I am starting to hate my WH for his treatment of others but not me?

My IM sent WH a dental bill and he replied with Hi BS...and my IM just simply said uhmmm no it's IM and WH replied with whatev. To me this is disrespectful and it infuriates me. Is WH just pissed he gets no direct contact with me? Just being a jerk to all who know me? It sure does piss me off considering he was happy for the IM. Now it's like anger everywhere. The A must still be in full tilt or he just really hates my guts.

He's being uncooperative over the business end of things with IM and just a real jerk all the way around.

Nearly 3mo into all this and i feel really raw. I'm doing stuff...but not enjoying much. Big faker I am. But trying. I'm just frustrated that it looks like I'll be divorced before the average affair even ends...and that makes me sad.

I do find that I think about him all the time...but it's less intense and less troublesome if that even makes any sense. I've had out of town family here for a week and I go to counseling today.

I just wish this all was over...yet I still hold out hope and that puts my mind in a weird spot.

Maybe I'm wrong but your IM isn't doing their job very well if you know this.

Your IM needs to filter out all that noise. Just let you know the facts. Or you need another IM.

You've only got a few weeks left, don't get pulled into his mind games.

She's actually much better at filtering than before. She was excited that he seemed to be acting nice. The whatev came later. But you're both right.

And I can't lie...I was encouraged. Sigh.....not!

You really need to fill this breaks in Plan B. You haven't been in a solid Plan B. You're addicted to him and his contact and don't see that your WH is an abusive wayward. You have two very strong reasons to see that your WH isn't good at all.

Why do you keep your standards so low? Do you not think you deserve better?

You're right. I do deserve better than what I'm settling for. I need to break from WH somehow.

You need to replace this obsession with other healthy things in your life. Hobbies, exercise, etc. Anything related to self-care is great.

Instead of gravitating towards those who will talk to you about your WH and give you that "fix" of obsession about him, tell those people you don't want to talk about him and if they continue to do so, avoid them.

This is part of YOUR job in Plan B - this is what is best for you and your children....so I hope you take what we are saying seriously.

Yes...I agree...and I will. It's very unhealthy and I recognize this. I'm sucking at this part. But I'm better than the treatment I'm getting.

Why can a WH not take responsibility for a single thing?

This morning my IM texted me that my WH is upset that he thinks I changed his mailing address for one of his CC back to an old address we lived at 3yrs ago. Uhmmmmm...no. I'm not responsible for where his mail goes nor did I change anything.

On top of it all he accused my IM of being me. I guess WH paranoia is setting in. My IM had to call him and leave a message on his VM to show it was her. Stupid.