I have been happily married for over 13 years, and as a husband I take pride in being there for my wife through thick and thin. Recently, she has been feeling down and depressed, my encouragement does not help her because she gets snippy and moody for me for small reasons or no reason at all. With her recent behavior, I no longer know if it is even worth me to continue encouraging her or being there for her. I am at my whits end because she is acting like a emotional "crack-up".

One example occurred on New Years Eve after we were leaving dinner. We were having a great time and wanted to go to the casino. She never initially led me to not want to go as I assumed that she wanted to. If she would have been clear with me and told me that she did not feel like it, I would not have gone out there. When we get to the casino, she throws an attitude with me.

Another example is when we go to the airport. I like to get up to the airport 3 hours early before takeoff because you never know how traffic is going to be. She berates me for getting her up there early because she "didn't get enough sleep". I tried to pray with her and told the devil that I bind him in the name of Jesus. She pulls away from me in the middle of my prayer.

After we made it home from our flight from the airport in my above example, we are driving home. She gets mad at me because I am passing slow moving cars and accelerating past them. I did not know I was doing anything wrong.

The above examples show that I cannot win for losing when I tell her how she is making me feel. All will she do is accuse me of having a "pity-party". Last night, I didn't want to join her in bed because I did not know if she was going to have an emotional outburst or "crack-up" moment. I slept on the couch. When she saw me out there and told me I was punishing myself, I simply told her that I was not comfortable joining her in bed. Like in football, I am tired of having her throw flags on me for her depression that I cannot control.

Honestly, I think she needs to be committed somewhere and get professional help. There is nothing I can do for her to battle her depression. She fails to see that the disrespect she has been giving me is hurting me on the inside. When I express how I feel, she tries to tell me how to feel and expects me to be a straight-laced stiff robot.

All I can do is pray, but I am officially close to giving up on her because I do not know if or when she will have another moody episode. I try my best to keep my frustration in, but when I get mad I will really get everything off my chest and say everything that I have been holding in.

Please help me determine if it is even worth me wanting to stay married to her. I am not a quitter, but I do not want to subject myself to emotional treatment from out of the blue by a 40+ year old woman who throws fits like a spoiled child. I guess you can't fix stupid sometimes. Yes, I am harsh when I am posting this because that is how she is making me feel even though I know I am not stupid.

Welcome back to MB.

I notice that you have made 5 posts here since 2006, and when I read the threads, I see the you have a habit of coming here to complain about your wife, and then abandoning the thread. Only once have you ever responded to a post that was made to you. Why don't you ever follow through after you have posted here? Such behaviour is unlikely to make people want to help you. You don't even acknowledge that anyone has replied to you. That's not very polite.

I also see that you make many disrespectful comments about your wife, and that in your previous posts, you say "I am what I am and I will not apologise for it". That attitude doesn't create or sustain a good marriage.

I also see no sign from you that you have ever read a word that Dr Harley has written, or that you have tried to use his basic concepts in dealing with your marital problems.

For example: are you familiar with the book Love Busters? Do you know what a disrespectful judgement is? Do you understand the Policy of Joint Agreement?

Hi, rp, welcome to Marriage Builders. I don't think any of us can make that determination for you, but if you would like to stay married, Dr. Harley's information can help you learn how to turn this around.

Wow, I don't think I'd put up with anybody praying with me like that. I am betting she felt your prayer was very disrespectful toward her.

Do you pray only in ways she is enthusiastic about?

Were you praying about the devil because you felt like the devil had a hold of your wife? What's with the devil reference? I believe in the devil but don't typically bring him up in daily prayer.

Dr. Harley's information on this website can help you understand your wife so that you understand her instead of thinking the devil is behind her actions.

No, there's a lot more you can do! Would you like a list?

Have you ever considered actually USING Marriage Builders concepts since you have been here for 10 years? If you had heart disease would you visit the waiting room of Dr. Michael DeBakey every few years to complain about your heart disease? Or would you go in and get treatment?