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I have talked to a PI, but I need more info so that I can catch her.
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Joined: Apr 2001
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I confirmed the affair with a VAR in the bedroom. She is using a secret phone. I'm not sure if I will find out who it is or whether it matters with this marriage headed for divorce. I am ready to expose but I won't be able to expose OM. Don't EXPOSE until you have the name and have verified who it is. You have nothing to expose yet.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2001
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I have talked to a PI, but I need more info so that I can catch her. such as? Why can't he follow her?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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He can, but she's extremely careful right now, not doing anything outside of normal schedules to tip me off, and I am wanting to get information on a rendezvous so that I have a better chance.
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Try when she might take a break at work, like lunch time.
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Here's my suggested plan -
1. Get a VAR and a phone with GPS in her car.
2. I have a friend that I was considering visiting on Saturday and I had mentioned it to her several days ago. After I let her know, she will schedule something and I in another car or PI can follow her. I think she will schedule something with OM.
3. I will try to keep everything on the down low until I find who the OM is and get into see a lawyer. File paperwork to divorce, wait for her to be served, and then EXPOSE. The surprise of the Divorce and Exposure will send her in a spiral and I may be able to negotiate a settlement with her.
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Wife already took half the joint bank account to a personal account. I moved the other half this morning. Wife found out and was MAD! Funny how it is okay for her.
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hope everything goes well for you dude!
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Thanks Hylton7!! I hope. She's already planning to marry this dude. She's wanting to get the house sold and then split. I'm trying not to fight and still playing along that I do not know anything. It's really hard. I'm pretty sad.
I'll take any encouragement by posters!!
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Joined: Nov 2010
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Are you documenting everything?
FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Get that VAR and GPS in her car ASAP.
FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Nov 2010
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What was her reason that she took half the money?
FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I found out from the VAR in the bedroom that she is leaving on Saturday.
What do I do?
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Joined: Apr 2001
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I found out from the VAR in the bedroom that she is leaving on Saturday.
What do I do? Did you hire the PI yet?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Secure all important documents and valuables now.
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I have contacted a PI but have not found a good time for him to come. I don't live close to the city, so it's going to set me back a lot of $$ to just get him here. I will do it. She has been staying pretty clear of suspicion to not throw me off.
My next spy technique - I bought the biggest external battery as possible and using a phone for GPS. I was very scared that she would hide her car keys so I slipped it in tonight. Unfortunately, I didn't get the battery fully charged. Didn't get the VAR in there. Time is running out for intel without a PI.
What do I document? I guess I could videotape all the household items.
I think she is also leaving so she doesn't have to pay half the bills. Seems like her lawyer told her something about it.
I want to expose but I know I need the name. I'm hoping GPS will lead me to OM.
My 17 yr old knows that I'm trying to find out OM name. She is getting ready to take the kids with her. He is staying quiet. If he doesn't go with her, she will have a problem. She's being really nice to the kids right now.
I'm trying to think of valuables that she might take. We are trying to sell our house so I don't think she'll take furniture for now. Tomorrow I can empty the gun safe and take them somewhere I guess. I did secure some money, which I think made her speed up the timetable.
I'll start looking at exposure. Is it different for divorce?
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Brainhurts - she said that she took half to protect herself. Said her parents advised her to. I have heard of men taking all money and have read this is a protection for spouses. WW is planning getting extra jobs.
What does people do with credit cards in these situations???
Do I need to shut them down? Help!!!!
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Thinking ahead about exposure...
WW works as a paraprofessional at a middle school. She is assigned to a special needs kid who is autistic. This is her second year with him so she is attached. The boys parents are pretty well known in our town, and I happen to know the boys father pretty well. He had been a victim to adultery with his first wife and it was a bad situation. I also work with him. He built a family with a new wife and seems happy. Both the mother and father love my wife and her work with their son.
When exposure comes, I think it would be in the best interest that they know. I'm not sure they would want their child with a lying, cheating, adulterer. Anyway, I would think they would call the school and have her removed from her assignment. This will make her so mad at me, she may never talk to me again.
I guess I will not have to deal with her wrath as much after she leaves. Please keep the comments coming. It motivates me to tell more of the story.
My 13yr old won't know what to do, and will likely go with his mom because he will think it's the right thing to do. I'm sad because he has been REALLY trying to play cards or games to have fun and break the tension in the house. He is such a great kid with a good heart. Unfortunately, he doesn't know how bad his mom is. She has been a good mother taking care of him, but a bad wife and mother supporting our family. This sucks!!
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The leaving may occur Friday. On the VAR, she is just saying a couple days to get through the school week. I could see her come home early and try to get kids to leave with her. My kids only go a half day on Friday. She works until 3:15 and I work until 5:00. Anything I should do to prepare?
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