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Joined: Apr 2017
Posts: 1
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I am trying my best to fix my marriage. My wife spends all of her time with a girl who is gay. I am a female as well. It started with me expressing I wanted to spend more time with her and that it seems like she would rather spend all her time with friends and talking to anyone but me. She started texting other people constantly mostly this girl and we got to point were we would just be in the same room but she would never give me real attention shed always half answer me since shed be busy with her phone. I started complaining alot then arguing alot then demanding to the point where I said I want a divorce because we are just existing in the same house. I know i messed up by the demands and the arguing. I even accused her of cheating or at least emotionally cheating I don't know for sure I just felt it becuase she Is talking to this girl constantly and always over there they even have group sleep overs regardless of how I felt about it 3 of them slept in a bed together. She says she's not cheating that they're just friends. I just joined the army and we just got stationed to this place in decemeber. And she really wanted friends out here becuase she doesn't like staying home all the time with the kids. I know i caused her to withdraw even more and now I've started trying to repair the damage I've caused. Focusing on filling her love bank and avoiding love busters. It is helping a little but with her still being gone all the time while I'm at work when I'm off and coming to bed late to either hang out or text or talk in another room I feel like my efforts won't be enough with all this distance. I'm scared I won't be able to fix this she hasn't worn her wedding ring since I threatened divorce and I'm afraid I've danged this beyond repair. Things get a little better last night she called me babe which she hasn't in a month only calls me by my name now. She actually said she's trying And that we'd try and if it doesn't work it doesn't compared to saying she's leaning towards divorce. And last night after going on a run she said she was going to her friends to watch a movie and then asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with her im guessing this weekend so there are improvements. That she is inviting me. But I still spend a lot of time by myself or by myself with the kids after work becuase she is going on a run or hanging with her friends until it 11 at night. I work so i have to sleep for the next day and it seems like she has no time for me so i am having trouble controlling my emotions and trying to fill her love bank when she's not here hardly. I came home at lunch and she said she was going to go vacuum her car and I said I was going back to work. This made her mad but I can't stand being at that house by myself constantly. I need help on how to fix this or how to make her want to be home I'm not saying all the time but I want some time with my wife. I want to feel important to her again. We have always been so close and this past month things have fell apart and I don't know if I can clean this up

Joined: Oct 2010
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EricSnow, please familiarize yourself with Dr. Harley's writings and posts on homosexual relationships. In addition to a chapter devoted to this subject in his book Defending Traditional Marriage, he commented on the application of his program to such relationships. Please read Do My Basic Concepts Apply to Same Sex Marriage?
If you have any further questions, please feel free to contact Dr. Harley on his radio show at the radio link at the top of each page. Thank you.


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