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What do you do with an Angry Wife? You expose the affair and wait for it to die a natural death. Thank you so much. Your answer has given me so much energy and power for my life. I am getting out of bed! I amazed by you guys.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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In your case, you stick to Dr Harley's advice. WierdSituation:
The fact that you have a restraining order against you, and your lawyer is adamant that if you expose you could lose joint custody of your children and assets that would normally go to you after a divorce, I'd take your lawyer's advice. I don't know enough about your situation as I only have your side of the story. But from what I have read in this thread so far, I'm not sure that exposure at this time would save your marriage, and you risk losing joint custody and significant assets. After the divorce is over, exposure would no longer be a legal risk, and I would encourage you to do it then. You will have a chance to remarry if you don't date for about two years, and offer your help to your ex-wife as she struggles to make sense of what has just happened to her. She was expecting sole custody and plenty of child support plus additional assets, and when it never came through, and her affair partner isn't the help she thought he would be, she might come to her senses. By the, she would have nothing, not even her affair partner. You might then step in to save her from her huge mistake if you are still interested in saving your relationship with her.
Dr. Harley
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In your case, you stick to Dr Harley's advice. WierdSituation:
The fact that you have a restraining order against you, and your lawyer is adamant that if you expose you could lose joint custody of your children and assets that would normally go to you after a divorce, I'd take your lawyer's advice. I don't know enough about your situation as I only have your side of the story. But from what I have read in this thread so far, I'm not sure that exposure at this time would save your marriage, and you risk losing joint custody and significant assets. After the divorce is over, exposure would no longer be a legal risk, and I would encourage you to do it then. You will have a chance to remarry if you don't date for about two years, and offer your help to your ex-wife as she struggles to make sense of what has just happened to her. She was expecting sole custody and plenty of child support plus additional assets, and when it never came through, and her affair partner isn't the help she thought he would be, she might come to her senses. By the, she would have nothing, not even her affair partner. You might then step in to save her from her huge mistake if you are still interested in saving your relationship with her.
Dr. Harley Thank you. The urge is too much. I will stick to the advice though. Patience. It reminds me of Yoda and Skywalker.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Weird Situation, you need to find something to do to occupy your time so you don't blow up your plan. You need to wait to expose until after the divorce is final. Turn over any crazy texts from WW to your attorney. You are not going to be able to POJA or meet her ENs.
The courts have effectively put you in Plan B. Continue that for now and find a hobby.
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Thank you. The urge is too much. I will stick to the advice though. Patience. It reminds me of Yoda and Skywalker. The urge will get you in trouble. Find a distraction, go for a walk. Do you have hobbies?
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FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Weird Situation, you need to find something to do to occupy your time so you don't blow up your plan. You need to wait to expose until after the divorce is final. Turn over any crazy texts from WW to your attorney. You are not going to be able to POJA or meet her ENs.
The courts have effectively put you in Plan B. Continue that for now and find a hobby. Thank you apples123. I will focus on personal and financial success. Multiple income streams and career goals. I will forward the texts and email to the attorney. I am feeling like I cannot find a hobby. This divorce shock has thrown me down a waterfall. Confused what hobby it is I have if any. I will find a hobby.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Thank you. The urge is too much. I will stick to the advice though. Patience. It reminds me of Yoda and Skywalker. The urge will get you in trouble. Find a distraction, go for a walk. Do you have hobbies? Thanks for putting me in a "straight line". Calm and patience I will be. I have seen how powerful and unforgiving urges can be. They totally lead to disaster. Hobbies - I like tennis, cycling. I feel I need more hobbies or at least more. Any suggestions on hobbies? I am thinking that I could learn how to swim well and sail.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Thank you BrainHurts. I read the article. It is very good and useful. I am armed with great knowledge. My wife never wanted to discuss and solve issues.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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I would personally make a short outline of your lives, preferrably with pictures. You lived alone with the children when thy were 2 and 5, so you may want to tell that as well (was this a time where you can proof beyond reasonable doubt that she was conducting an affair?).
Don't give the impression that you think she is a monster. You want to be seen as cooperative and doing everything so that the children will have a relationship with both parents.
Stress your own interest and ability to maintain a healthy and stable home environment. If she has to work you can offer to take the children. Yes this was the time.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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What should I do?
Our S just told me WW's grandparents passed away in December.
I thought of writing an email to WW and pass it first to attorney and see what the attorney says.
Last edited by WierdSituation; 04/05/17 06:40 AM.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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What should I do?
Our S just told me WW's grandparents passed away in December.
I thought of writing an email to WW and pass it first to attorney and see what the attorney says. Saying what?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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What should I do?
Our S just told me WW's grandparents passed away in December.
I thought of writing an email to WW and pass it first to attorney and see what the attorney says. Saying what? Saying "My condolences. I found out that grandparents passed away from our S. I am very sorry to hear that grandparents are no longer with us. They were great people to us. They will always be in mind. I loved them. I wish you and our families strength. "
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Please remind me, are you allowed to contact her?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Please remind me, are you allowed to contact her? We are allowed to talk only about kids through text and email. She writes about other things but I have difficulty with that because it is not about kids. She can do that and not get in trouble.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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She just wrote an email asking me to remove her name from our joint business bank account. She took money from it before serving me with divorce papers. She also has not disclosed to court the business credit cards she owned basically covering her trails. I passed the email to my attorney. Any other ideas?
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Could you vets and child custody winners share what makes someone a winner? How did you win custody?
I met with the child custody forensics psychiatrist and he asked me to write concerns I have about her not getting custody. He said I can bring evidence if I want. I will only write the truth and all what she has done, and bring evidence and let him be the judge. I certainly do not want her to get custody for many legitimate reasons that have nothing to do with being vindictive but only for the kids. This is my chance. I have to submit this in a few days.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Update:
I do not understand. She stopped child custody forensics evaluation saying that there is no money for the child custody evaluation to continue. She did this by informing the forensics psychiatrist who then informed all the attorneys and the judge. He said he will pause the evalaution because he cannot continue without get paid. She is the one who pushed for it even though the judge said ask her not to.
Puzzling. Is she cutting her losses? What do you make of this?
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Update:
I do not understand. She stopped child custody forensics evaluation saying that there is no money for the child custody evaluation to continue. She did this by informing the forensics psychiatrist who then informed all the attorneys and the judge. He said he will pause the evalaution because he cannot continue without get paid. She is the one who pushed for it even though the judge said ask her not to.
Puzzling. Is she cutting her losses? What do you make of this? Assuming a rational cause, I suspect she has concluded that the evaluation is not likely to gain the advantage for her that she once expected. I doubt she views it as cutting losses. Rather, she views this as redeploying her limited resources. She intends to continue fighting for the best deal she can get.
me-65
wife-61
married for 40 years
DS - 38, autistic, lives at home
DD - 37, married and on her own
DS - 32, still living with us
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[/quote]Assuming a rational cause, I suspect she has concluded that the evaluation is not likely to gain the advantage for her that she once expected. I doubt she views it as cutting losses. Rather, she views this as redeploying her limited resources. She intends to continue fighting for the best deal she can get. [/quote]
Thank you mrEureka. This keeps me on guard.
BH(me)-48 WW-43
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