Well it's been a few days since I've been on MB. Things have been so crazy. The tragic events that took place in N.Y. my father is in the hospital in Mid-town Manhattan and on Tuesday we couldn't get through to the hospital. Finally we were able to get through and they reassured us that everyone there is fine. Hopefully we will be able to get to the city on Sat. I totally freaked out on my WH yesterday so any chance of reconcliation is gone. Between the stress of worrying about my father helping my mother until he returns home and my own problems I just lost it. On top of that I was PMSing really really bad. I went offf on him on the phone and then he came over last night and I was still *****y. I told him to just file for the D and I would sign the papers. Last night our conversation turned into a bit of an argument and he said this is why I will never come home. Financially we are screwed his answer to this is we will figure something out. Guess I shouldn't complain to much because he still gives me about 85% of his paycheck. Tonight he said to me I don't get you yesterday you were a B**** and today it's a 360 degree turn around. He said no more romance between us. I really don't think he will ever be home again. It doesn't seem to matter what happens finances, family problems whatever he's still not coming home. Has this happened to anyone else and then you did reconcile? It's almost 6mos. since he left and nothing has changed. Any advice?<BR>cybil

Hi Cybil, sorry I'm not there, but I'm sure some others with more experience can help...<P>I wanted to say how sorry I was for your stress and all the pain you must be going through.<P>One huge LB will not make or break what has happened. It may make it worse and harder to recover from, but it is not the end of the world, k?<P>If your H is realistic at all, he will realize what was going on and cut you some slack. At least turn the major LB into a tiny LB...<P>Good luck Cybil, I hope your father is getting better.<BR>HbH

Cybil...<P>It's not surprising, given the tremendous stress you are under that you would go off on your H. It is totally understandable, except I suppose for your H. These WS at times are so wrapped up int heir own world they just don't see the pain they are causing others. Don't see it let alone care about it. <P>I would suggest you take a break and back off a little if that's possible for you. <P>I wish I had a better answer for you. Your H seems to be deep int he fog and while he is it is really tought to reach him.<P>Best of luck <P>E <P>