Does anyone else have this problem. <BR>I am addicted to MarriageBuilders. <P>Sometimes I tell myself I will logon once a day and that lasts about a week and then other days, I am on all day. Sometimes I just lurk. <P>Sometimes it brings me great pain to remember and respond bringing up triggers. <P>Other days I look and think, we are all insane. has the whole world gone mad?<P>Sometimes I drain myself trying to help others. <P>Sometimes its lonely here. <P>Sometimes I can't post because I already know all the responses. There is nothing new under the sun. There is no new profound advice. There is only pain to feel.<P>The new members are overwhelming.<P>The same questions get posted with the same responses month after month.<P>How do you let go?...<BR>Should I let go?...<BR>You guys are the ONLY ones who knows and can relate to what its like.<P>But there is life to live out there...this can't be it.

HAHA - Boy!! Do I understand!!<P>Look at this thread I wrote in 1999 (p.s. *my name as different, then).<P><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum1/HTML/006634.html" TARGET=_blank>Addicted to this message board</A><P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>And we know. We who have seen. ~Pellegrino

I know exactly what you mean. I too have the addiction. I find myself checking the computer every hour just to get on and look. Or, I find myself reading all night long and I can't peal myself away from the computer. I don't post to many because I don't have that much advice, and some I just feel really bad for but have nothing to give them. When I am feeling better I start posting to everyone, and then when I feel bad I will usually just read or post my own thread. I even come on here and find nothing of interest and read it anyway. I think it has helped, but sometimes it brings me down. <P>Nothing against the old timers, they are great, but I sometimes think to myself...please shoot me if I am still on here in a year or two.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SEM:<BR><B>Nothing against the old timers, they are great, but I sometimes think to myself...please shoot me if I am still on here in a year or two.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>LOLLOLLOL - I was writing my message above when you wrote this... hee hee hee hee Yep, it's been two (plus a couple of months!) years since I came here. BUT, my life has completely changed. I am divorced from my (previous)H of 20 years, and remarried, altho it has been ANYTHING but easy. My MB friends have helped me, lifted me, and given me hope over those two years... and I feel blessed to have found this place, and learned to live the concepts (the best I can) with my new H.

SEM Everything will work out in Gods plan. Hold on tight OK...I have made it so far.. 3 weeks after dday..YOU CAN DO IT...but please I will not forgive my husband if he stayed with me cause it was the easyist choice...nah..He will stay and I will stay cause it was the right choice..as was in the beginning : ))) I will not settle as being the easy choice....OK

I feel that way, too, sometimes, but felt better when I read Nyneve's link to August 1999. Those people were also addicted to this board. But who are they? I don't recognize any of their names (except Nyneve). I guess they just got over it, hopefully because their marriages recovered. <P>Rose Red

Actually Rose,<P>The only one of those who is still around is TnT... she's on the Woman's Prayer Forum, if you'd like to drop by and see how she is.<P>I looked at the names too, and realized I remember Holly really well (as another WS who was a wife)... but I think something changed when my (then)H began cheating, and then I clung to other BS's... my focus changed, so I didn't keep up with everyone else as well. I know I've missed Wex, and a few asked where he was about a year ago. <P>You're right... too many new faces, too many to count. Daily, in fact.<P>It's so sad.

I have learned so much at MB by just reading the post...I don't respond allot because I really don't have a whole lot of advice to offer. Lots of times all I can do is just let someone know that I care about them and what they are going through. I am very thankful for the support you find on this board....My activity goes in spurts....sometimes I am not on for days and then sometimes I am on all day......thank God this place exist......<P>------------------<BR>always-faith4us

notheard,<P>Just wait til you're here for 2 years! LOL LOL<P>I've been here for 17 months (tomorrow!) and I'm still lurking everyday! LOL It's funny because I too have tried to leave and I can't! I've grown to truly love some of my friends here. And I sincerely care about everyone that posts. I may not reply much, but I do read! <P>Mitzi (another MB addict! LOL)<P>

<B>DITTO</B> I need my MB fix each day....be it day or night. I get rather contrary when I have difficulty getting into the site.......grrrrrr.......lol!<P>I feel that as long as people have marriages, there is a need for a supportive site such as MB. Everyone needs a helping hand now and then.<P>------------------<BR><B>Time heals all wounds as long as you DON'T pick at them!</B>

notheard,<P>You have actually been heard by the "True" MB Addict (Nyneve) herself!<P>She's the only person I know that can start a thread and two hours later have 90 replies. <P>As someone who has been here now for close to a year, I keep thinking of Yoda...<P>"once you start down the dark path...forever will it dominate your destiny!" <P> There is no cure.

There is a lot to learn here. I believe the wisdom here has saved my sanity. It makes me feel like I am NOT alone as the loneliness of betrayal tries to "eat" me up. I don't really have deep friendships here but I feel a bond with all who have been through the heartache I am going through. <P>Hi my name is Carol and I am a MBaholic. <P>Keep coming---it works it you work it. (all principles are the same---they need work)<P>TW<P>------------------<BR>Psalm 23

Oh no....I still lurk....with a recovered marriage too!<P>I take it in spells...I am off for a while and then once I am back...I am addicted. It is sorta like soap operas! I hate 'em, don't even watch them...but it is tune in tomorrow and see what happens next!!!

It's funny because at first we got addicted to the material, then I ventured out to the discussion forum and WHAM! It hit me, something that I never ever faced, really--all the painful emotions I caused to MMs wife years ago... <P>After a while I was brave enough to venture onto the Pregnancy/Child forum and oooooowee! You think BSs are angry at OPs in GQII, you ain't seen nothin' yet! But I knew that this place is where I belong, to make amends, sorta, for all the pain I caused.<P>Many on GQII don't realize how much worse it would/could be if a child was born from the affair! OMGosh! Then you have two innocent people: the BS and the OC... OUCH. But basically, I wanted to encourage people that there is recovery after an affair because MM and his W are still married and no longer paying me child support, my oldest is doing very well and living a productive life, I'm married and not planning to repeat my past stupidity.<P>At least I'm not finding excuses to come in to work when my computer at home is crashing too much on weekends!

Rookies... <P>Hey Susan---you are an "old-timer". I'm wondering if you were here even before me???<P>I've been here over three years now. Yikes---where's that bullet???

Well, not to be confused with another Susan...there were 2, but one divorced. That was not me....I recovered, thank God.<P>I really don't know how long I have been here, it has been so long..and my profile says unavailable... I know I was in therapy for over 2 years...and I came here long before that...sometimes as only a lurker.<P>I sorta think I came before or with Nyneve (new beginning)....

I too am addicted to MB. I came here trying to have some understanding as it is my daughter who is/was? an OW. First I read all the articals and then found the forum and the rest, as they say, is history!<BR>I have even had a session with Jen Harely!<BR>Our daughter is in couseling and says that it's, over but after reading here, I have a hard time beliving this.<BR>Is there a sight that deals with the OP in the same way that MB does? I mean not the ones where they support the A but ones that bring the single OP into reality and out of the FOG?<BR>Not that she would do anything I ask, but there must be some book or sight that says "WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING".<BR>If one has to be addicted to something then better MB than other things I could think of.<BR>I HATE the hurt I read about and I hate that my own D is apart of it. She has no idea how this is hurting her too-------------YET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<BR>I believe the concepts are so great for all of ones life and I have learned so much here. I no longer give ANY disrespectful judgements and my husband and I are reading the books together. I may not be able to help my D but it will make me a better person--------if I can get away from here long enough to have a life LOL.<P>------------------<BR>Marry

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Susan:<BR><B>Well, not to be confused with another Susan...there were 2, but one divorced. That was not me....I recovered, thank God.<P>I really don't know how long I have been here, it has been so long..and my profile says unavailable... I know I was in therapy for over 2 years...and I came here long before that...sometimes as only a lurker.<P>I sorta think I came before or with Nyneve (new beginning)....</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Yes, there was another Susan, which totally confused me. I think she reregistered as "sue" and yes she is divorced.<P>I registered shortly after you, Susan. K was before both of us. <P>Although, those before August, 1999 have no "date of reg" on their profile. Check yours out and see -- K too. I think the first crash nabbed those dates right out... then there was the second crash which blotted out all our posts, and then finally, the last almost-crash, that became the "Read Only" posts. Whew!!

Hi...my name is Marsha and I too am an MBaholic...<P>Seriously...a good friend of mine, who teaches beside me says that she is greatful that I found all of you...she enjoys and laments with me your stories...<P>When I was upset yesterday at the 'unrepentant' WH's and with a couple of posters harsh remarks, she said..."I think some people don't get that you all are real people..." What a profound statement for someone who doesn't even post here.<P>I hope that I am here 2-3-4 years down the road and that, recovered or not, I can still be positive and hopeful to the newbies in pain...just maybe not ALL DAY OR ALL NIGHT ..<P>Cali<P>------------------<BR><I>Live Impeccably In Your Word.<BR>Don't Take Anything Personally.<BR>Make No Assumptions.<BR>Do Your Best Always. </I>

Yep K, three years here for me too. I don't want that bullet!! I'm a chicken!! LOL<P>SEM, I agree. When I first came here in Mar 1998, I loved hearing success stories. But they also scared me. Scared because I wondered "if they were so successful, why were they still here? Was this thing never ever going to go away?" <P>I now understand. When I came here, we were already in recovery but I was having a horrible time with anger and hurt. The wonderful people here helped me so much. By reading this web site and the suggested books, my shakey recovery now had a plan with goals and a plan to live by. Thanks to this board and some super supportive friends, I can honestly say we are doing better than I ever dreamed possible. But when do you determine recovery is over? That you are "finished" with everything this site can offer? That you are completely "healed and over it?" <P>I also visit and read this site often because I owe. I owe this forum my support, my shoulder when it may be needed and any advice I can offer. It's hard to follow all the stories since there are always so many new people but I always make it a point to look for the posts that have no responses and try to respond with something, anything, to move that post up and let the poster know someone heard, we do care and hopefully others will add to it.<P>I wish we had a way of contacting many of the "old posters" to see how they are doing now. Kind of a MB reunion. It's hard to follow so many stories and never know the endings......