Maybe it is an identity crisis. He says he has no goals and dreams, doesn't know how to figure them out. Asked me why he just can't live and take what is given to him. I understand not resisting life, it is futile, but to not actively work to shape your life? He seems to have lost a sense of him....but he is attending an art class, and art and music hold a special place in his heart. He did tell me that the class lets him escape everything for a while....I hope he is working to bring it into his life more fully, and working on it at home as well...<P>I feel like he is so lost, and sad and confused. One of the reasons I can't give up...the look in his eyes is lost, like he just doesn't know. His words say he wants out, but here and there he tells me he just wants to find him, because he doesn't know what HE wants.<P>Why am I musing out loud here? Jusdt because. Thought maybe someone would have insight. See a large difference with my situation is that we have been married 2 years and together a total of 6...not the decades everyone else seems to have been together. On top of that, we are both mid twenties, so I know that is a time of discovering ourselves (something we did discuss before marriage and realized might be an issue at a point, but we also discussed that knowing that it might happen and knowing that we have to role with changes in our partner, and deciding that we loved them enough to roll with it would be half of the battle). AND we have no children or house...so there is no reason for us to stay together or make us work it out...in essense a bit easier to walk away, especially for him, if he had children or a house he would work on things before walking, instead of walking without trying.<P>But I was just babbling He just looks lost and confused half the time, and then so resolute others....like he is taking a stand, but doesn't know for what and why.....<P>Thanks for listening....ME

I think that there is a state of general "life crisis" that just appears most commonly in mid life (my H was 35). When my best friend had her A she was only 24 and she was definitely in a 'life crisis". She had been with her H since she was 14 years old, got married right after high school, had a small child. She started with the "I want to live my life, I want to be free, there has to be more than this" type stuff. So her life crisis was brought on by taking so much on at a young age and never doing a lot of the things that other people her age got to do. Then she had an affair with a super cheesy married guy (he was married for the 4th time and all of his Ws after the first one had been his OW) and fortunately realized that she really did have a good life in the first place. She and her H are one of the happiest couples I know.

Well that is a prmising story...I need those right now. I know full well the realities of what could very well happen, and I just need some hope restoration Sometimes they give me too much reality here, got t6hat at home, come here for hope <P>Thanks for sharing that story, hopefully my H will see that I love him and always will, and will decide that that is important to his life, and one of the keys to life. It is almost as if he doesn't want to LET himself be loved for some reason....he's a people pleaser so he is uncomfortable with people doing FOR him (like loving him unconditionally), he tells me he just can't give me as much as I can give him...like he feels he can't give as much love as I have and therefore feels guilty for receiving it....<P>Ah, well shall see....just babbling today