Gosh!!! Its so good to back, I will try to make this brief also I'm sure lots of us are going to be posting. Anyway brief history for newbies, My H moved out 1 month ago living at his parents around the block from me and the kids. we are together 26 yrs. 18 yrs. M. 3 kids 15,12,9. D-day July 24, 2001. He was having an A for over a year until I found out by an e-mail he recieved from her, I was devasted. Anyway I went to talk to a lawyer to get some info. She tells me that he should be paying all the house bills which he is, and he should be giving me 120.00 dollars a week towards food, which he out right refuses. So I have been paying for food with my check, I am so confused if I want to get the money I derserve I have to retain the lawyer for 2000.00 dollars eek...!!! thats a lot of money right now, So I am taking day by day. H has been very nasty to me we have a hard time talking without getting into a fight. My youngest she is really having a hard time with everything she doesn't want to go out with H unless I go, but I cannot I don't feel its right we are not really speaking. Anyway I could go on forever will update again soon. Welcome back everyone!!!! Love and Hugs Sally

Have you looked into "Legal Aid"? They provide free/low cost legal services to those who cannot afford a lawyer. Your H needs to be paying you what you are legally entitled to. Some states also have special Legal Aid for SAHMs. Check out <A HREF="http://www.divorcenet.com" TARGET=_blank>www.divorcenet.com</A> they sometimes have info on legal aid for some states.

KalGrl, Thanks for the info. I will look into it. It all just seems so final when you get a lawyer. But if he is giving me a hard time I leaves me no other option. sally

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Sad Sally:<BR><STRONG>Gosh!!! Its so good to back, I will try to make this brief also I'm sure lots of us are going to be posting. Anyway brief history for newbies, My H moved out 1 month ago living at his parents around the block from me and the kids. we are together 26 yrs. 18 yrs. M. 3 kids 15,12,9. D-day July 24, 2001. He was having an A for over a year until I found out by an e-mail he recieved from her, I was devasted. Anyway I went to talk to a lawyer to get some info. She tells me that he should be paying all the house bills which he is, and he should be giving me 120.00 dollars a week towards food, which he out right refuses. So I have been paying for food with my check, I am so confused if I want to get the money I derserve I have to retain the lawyer for 2000.00 dollars eek...!!! thats a lot of money right now, So I am taking day by day. H has been very nasty to me we have a hard time talking without getting into a fight. My youngest she is really having a hard time with everything she doesn't want to go out with H unless I go, but I cannot I don't feel its right we are not really speaking. Anyway I could go on forever will update again soon. Welcome back everyone!!!! Love and Hugs Sally</STRONG><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>[/LIST]<P>Hi Sally,<P> Gosh, I am really sorry to hear about all the problems you are having. H was having an affair for a whole year. Didn't you suspect anything? How did you find out? Isn't there any chance of you two getting back together? I wouldn't be so quick to get a divorce. It seems like there is a lot of pain involved for the whole family.. So Sorry.

Sally,<P>I am so sorry how this is affecting your children. It's amazing how the WS just can't seem to see what they're doing to the kids is so hurtful!<P>I think it's great that you've sought legal counsel in your situation. And IMO, you should find a way to get all you can. Gee.. that makes me sound like I'm saying "get him for all he's worth!"... ouch! That's not it. Honest. Legally, you can give him some doses of reality. You still have to protect you and your kids first, and legally is the best way.<P>Karen

Hi Sally- good to see you on the board here posting again! Do you suspect your H is still seeing OW? Has he said anything about wanting to end the A to you? If not then you are better off not going places with him or having any discussions about your future together because it will just upset you believe me I have been there!!!! My H was totally a stranger to me and uncommitted to me again until about 2 mo after he ended all contact and had gone thru a depression/withdrawal from OW. Only then did he start to be like his old self again. Its a good thing you're seeking legal advice. He needs to wake up and smell the coffee! lifeismessy

Spiro, Thank you for your reply, I did suspect something during that yeaar, but I was in such denial I didn't want to accept it. I found out from an e-mail I found on the computer, I was devasted. At this point I don't see us getting back together he is to much in fog right now. I am not rushing into divorce. <P><BR>Hi Karen, yes my D is having a really togh time, I try to tell H but he just doesn't understand, he thinks its my fault she is having problems. I am glad I went to a lawyer, I revieced some good info.<P>Hi lifeismessy, Its good to see you on the board again, thanks for your reply. I am not sure if he is seeing OW anymore My contact with H is very limited at this point.<BR>I have no desire to go out with him and the kids right now, I need to sort my own things oout. When he takes the kids out on Sunday I will use that time for me. I really need a break it's been a really rough road since he left. Thanks Love Sally