Just wondering, how many people are like me? The product of a marriage broken apart by infidelity? My parents split when my father found out about my mother's A. Any else dealing with not only an A in their own marriage, but the pains of childhood?

burns1471,yes unfourntunatley my parents were divorced when I was 12, very difficult time in my life, my dad was a cheater. Now I am going through it again but this time I am the wife my H is the WS. the pain I feel right now is not just for myself but for my kids I know exactly how they feel that there father left its horrible. I am so angry at WH for just giving up on us. Love Sally

My first marriage ended in divorce because of H's infidelity. My parents were divorced when I was 4, according to my father because of my mother's infidelity, which my mother denies. My grandparents were divorced when my mother was 8 due to both being unfaithful w/ my grandmother claiming my grandfather did it first. My great-grandparents divorced when my grandmother (same one in previous sentence) was a teenager, but I never knew the reason for that one. My family is cursed.<p>My main reason for continuing in this M after my H's A is because of our children. I've seen the destruction of four generations of divorce.<p>Now, I have to add that I know someone who is divorcing her WS for the exact same reason I am staying. Her family history is remaining married after adultery, and she has witnessed generations of this and sees divorce as a means of breaking the cycle of pain.<p>After hearing her story I am now led to believe that it is the adultery that causes the pain and destruction and not necessarily the chosen remedy in the aftermath, which may explain why God allows divorce, something He hates, as an option for the BS.<p>Conqueror

Yup, M had an A some 9 years ago and eventually married OM. It literally killed my F, he died inside and became a hermit (quite insane I'm convinced), it just took him 9 years to die physically.<p>Then 4 years ago, I was the WS in an EA. That took a toll on me and I feel I began to die inside just like my F (though W didn't find out until recently). I believe that "shut down" was the cause of her lacking EN's and ultimately her PA (at which point I revealed my EA).<p>Sure seems to be a vicious cycle, doesn't it.<p>K