Today my YS and I were chatting while he ate a snack after school. We were discussing how he would need to change a few things if he wants to start karate again, he said he give up his shows, but I could tape them. I told him I hadn't hooked up the VCR to where we could tape, he did wasn't happy. <p>I said something about well mom hasn't had a lot help (he knew I meant setting up our home back here in the states). <p>My YS is 9, he looks up at me and goes "yeah it is Dad's fault." <p>I said I never said that he goes "But Dad wanted the divorce," before I could reply that Mom was divorcing dad, <p>He goes "I know you are but Dad wanted it and forced you to do it" I asked him who told him that, he said "I figured it out" <p>What could I say, it is the truth. [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Would love to share this tid bit with my STBX but he would think I am putting ideas in my YS's head.

They know [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] ... just hold your head above water and don't need to share it w/ STBX. Actually my 9 years old D tried to tell me about "a mustache man" that look suspicious asking direction to mom, meet again in Costco and the book store this 03/01 ... guess what, it is OM and d-day is 9/01.
My WW denied it in her FOG but she quickly shut up when I told her I will bring D to meet OM and let her point her finger at him. Disgusting [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] !!!.
It is a shamed that they have to mature like this. Belive me they know ... they know whose fault it is no matter what you try to tell them.

Children are certainly a LOT more in tune with what's going on in the world than we sometimes give them credit for.<p>Kudos to you for raising your son so that he knows how to read underneath peoples' facades (ie. your H's).<p>Karen

Dear Sing,<p>It is good to hear from you and nice to see your boys supporting you. When my son would say stuff like that, I always encouraged him to have 'open communication with his dad'. At one point, my son said, dad won't understand. In fact he said, 'mom, I'm embarrassed to talk to dad about it.' Imagine, this little boy knew what his dad was doing (A) was wrong. He did not want to embarress his dad. Later he did tell his dad what he thought. Those small conversations had an impact on H. <p>I know you are being a great mom. Keep up the good work. <p>
L.

Sing:<p>It's good to hear an update on you. I hope things are a littler better for you at least. My 7yo daughter has done one of those "out the mouth of babes" too. Upon learning that her dad had a girlfriend and had been lying to her for two years, she said, "you need to read the bible and see what God says about divorce; you have broken my heart and mommy's and yd's; you tell her (the OW) what I said" Later, she asked him what the OW had said and WS said OW said she was sorry. My daughter's reply was "well, didn't she know that before???" My children are REALLY feeling the effects of this divorce and their father's betrayal. I feel so helpless.<p>Take care.<p>Ashley

Sing, Kids are a lot smarter and in tune than most give them credit for. I believe it's a survival instinct for them. If you consider that, particularly younger children, depend on thier parents for everything, it only makes sense that they would be hyper aware of all going on within the family unit. I wish you all the best.<p>Paul

I hear all of you loud a clear. Whenever my daughters (4 & 6) & I are coming home from anywhere (school, shopping, etc), the conversation always includes;<p>
Kids - Is Mommy home?<p>Me - yes<p>Kids - Is she asleep?<p>Me - we'll find out when we get home.<p>Kids - Why does she sleep so much?<p>Me - she's really tired<p>Kids - She sure does like long naps doesn&#8217;t she?<p>Me - yes<p>
It's very sad when the kids start to understand their mother's behavior is not normal. I've done my best to shield them over the last 2 years, hoping that wife would get better, but it's quickly coming to the point where the kids will begin to see that my answers are a bit evasive. Last week I overheard them talking to each other and they were trying to figure out why mommy is so tired. I'm afraid that if I tell them she is sick (depression) then that would be a huge LB for the wife. On the other hand, if I don't, they might begin to loose some of their trust in me or think it's because of them.

sing,<p>It really touched me to read the comments of your YS, who is right in between the ages of my two (6 & 12).<p>I hope that you continue to do well.<p>redhat,<p>Just out of curiosity, does your user name refer to the Linux distro?<p>Steve

sing,<p>PS, did you know that I count at least 5 former Astros on the dBacks?<p>Schilling, Johnson, Finley, Gonzales, and Swindell.<p>Here's hoping that the new manager can help get us there someday.<p>Steve

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by StillHers:
<strong>redhat,<p>Just out of curiosity, does your user name refer to the Linux distro?<p></strong><hr></blockquote><p>Yes ... all good names has been taken and I feel like the underdog in my current situation.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by StillHers:
<strong>sing,<p>PS, did you know that I count at least 5 former Astros on the dBacks?<p>Schilling, Johnson, Finley, Gonzales, and Swindell.<p>Here's hoping that the new manager can help get us there someday.<p>Steve</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Doesn't it just make your blood boil? Why couldn't Johnson win a playoff game when he as An Astro? I always liked Finley & Gonzales, can't believe Swindell is still playing?<p>I think the Astros need a shrink or a heart transplant when it comes to the playoff's!!!<p>good to see your name on here. Hope things are going well for you.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by sing:
<strong>
Why couldn't Johnson win a playoff game when he as An Astro?
</strong><hr></blockquote>
Not his fault--he pitched for us about like he has lately. All that stuff about a 7 game playoff losing streak and now a 3 or 4 game winning streak for Johnson is so much nonsense. His ERA is not that different over most of thos games...most of the difference is in the run support he's gotten.<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>
I always liked Finley & Gonzales, can't believe Swindell is still playing?
<hr></blockquote>
I hear you. Finley and Gonzo are a lot better than when with us. Coaching, weightlifting (Creatine etc?) or what? I don't know. No one at either the Astros or Cubs knew that Gonzo was really Babe Ruth in disguise.<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>
I think the Astros need a shrink or a heart transplant when it comes to the playoff's!!!
<hr></blockquote>
Maybe both. Wish I had the answer.<p><strong>Hope things are going well for you.</strong>
Pretty well, thanks. I now have a permanent job in the field (IT) that I've wanted to change to. Not yet exactly what I wanted to do or want to be paid, but a start. My relationship is up and down, but probably a slight positive trend.<p>Steve<p>[ November 04, 2001: Message edited by: StillHers ]</p>