Posted this originally on Recovery Board:<p>Need a little input here. This is what happened. My H and OW work for the same municipality, but in different depts. Normally they would never run into each other, but there is the chance my H would be asked to go to her worksite because of his job specialty. He did so yesterday and was most honest with me and told me about it when I got home. His supervisor does not know of my H's A. My H told me early in our recovery he would tell his supervisor, only if this type of situation came up. My H made the judgement call to go to OW's worksite, doing so because he went with another co-worker and not alone, I guess. He did not see her or ask about her and was with his co-worker (male) the whole time. Did the job he needed to do and left as soon as they were done.<p>My ?: Just by going there, did he break the "No Contact" rule? I'm surprised he did go, because he told me if this situation came up, he'd ask his supervisor to send someone else. I'm a little uneasy about this. Probably because of the "potential" of contact. And of course one of the first things my H said to me after telling me of this situation, "You don't trust me and you never will." I trust to a point I guess. Any thoughts??<p>LIP

No, he did not in the least bit break the "no contact" rule. You need to cut him some slack here. <p>Your H made a judgement call. Yeah, in the perfect recovery, your H would have called you first, you would have POJA'd and both decided what he should do. BUT, he probably figured that what you really didn't want was for him to have any contact with the OW.<p>So, from his point of view, if he goes with another male co-worker, does his job and doesn't do what you don't want him to do, then he did a good job.<p>And he did. Just try to see it from his eyes. He done good.<p>If it keeps bugging you, just tell him that you are VERY happy that he was honest with you, you are glad the trip went that well, and that you hope he may include you in these decisions beforehand, just so you are not caught off-guard again.<p>It's not a big deal. Mostly in your head. Happens to all of us. Don't freak out on him, it will definately backfire.<p>HbH