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Joined: Apr 2001
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I sometimes follow oldtimers stories for the perspective it brings. I came across this while tracing Karenna's posts.<p>I decided to bring it up because..I often question why I bought "some of the goods I was sold"...<p>I knew, but she seemed so convincing.<p>I wasn't alone.<p>And..it's about them. The BS contribute what they do,but this mess is about them.<p>And so.. here it is..<p> http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum1/HTML/007371.html<p>[ December 13, 2001: Message edited by: Family Man ]</p>

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Oh yeah I think I have heard a handfull of those.<p>My version:<p>First D-Day (just hours after it happened)
"We just shared bed and that felt like the most evil thing I have ever done in my life"<p>A couple of hours later:
"I just said ok to sharing bed because she looked so sad and so indefense, like a little kid" (HAHA! funny)<p>A week after:
"We just cuddled and she put her head on my shoulder" (I HATE the word cuddling and I HATE putting my head on his filthy shouder)<p>A year after:
"I forgot completely about you, that is why I accepted to share bed, now drop it"<p>2 years after:
"I thought I could make things work with her like they used to (abusive girlfriend, or wonderful wife... hmmm let me think which one should I choose). Well we just didn't cuddle, we got more close than that"<p>A couple of hours and interrogation after that:
"We only had dry sex, I don't even know who started, and since I thought that wasn't real sex I said it was nothing"<p>2 months later:
"Is that you continue to ask so much it makes me thing I should make up other affairs so you'll leave me alone, like that guy on the movie.... not that I think it is a good idea though"<p>---So we will see what else is on store, what you all think, is he STILL hiding something?

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I actually laughed while reading some of these famous "quotes". Granted, they are not funny but I found at least 5 lies that my H himself used. <p>I also had a few new ones:<p>1)I wanted to tell you
2)We tried on numerous occassions to break if off but we just had to see each other
3) This is my favorite phrase quoted many times while affair was going on - "I'm so glad you and I have a strong marriage and you trust me cause you know five minutes of pleasure is not worth a lifetime of pain"<p>Hang in there kiddo<p>
The OW told me that my H would gaze lovingly into her eyes and tell her he loved her. Incidently, he told her he and I were separated, (his way of instigating an affair that, as he said, "I didn't plan this, it just happened". Yeah right!!<p>I don't know where trust and belief comes back in, I do know it takes a looooooooong time. Any setback seems to catapult me back to the beginning. <p>Hope all gets better for you.<p>Married: 22 years
two kids: 16 and 18

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I'm sure I've posted these several times before. [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] One thing I noticed was that several WS said, "He/she's just a friend!" (uh-huh ... I know I *always* have sex with all of my friends, lol!) This seems to be a WS classic. Perhaps we should print up t-shirts? Bumper stickers, perhaps?<p>"Have a Nice Day"
"Envision World Peace"
"My kid is an honor's student"
"She's just a friend"<p>Just trying to make light here ... once I get to the point where I look back on those days and roll my eyes at the immense stupidity flowing out of H's mouth, I think I'll be sane again. <p>belld

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Yes, it is all about them, Family Man ....... but it is also so indignent, disrespectful and plain old vile to be a BS and lied to in this manner. <p>I would like to think my H was trying to protect me from being hurt, but when he lied he looked me right in the eyes and smiled sweetly, didn't even blink. It sickens me.<p>Jo<p>[ December 13, 2001: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>


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