WH was planning to call OW after 2 months of no-contact by phone instead he drove 400 miles before he was to meet with brother & nephew to have a weekend fishing trip.<p> WH called our motel at 5:30a.m. to tell me after a night of soul searching he was now ready to recommit to our marriage and he said he realized he was a fool and that he love me. He voice was light like the weight that has been around his neck for the last 3 years was lifted.<p> I was using the weekend to enjoy kids & their friends along with trying to decided if now was the time to go to B. I did enjoy the rest of the weekend - not many crashes. I thought WH was at home Fri. night until I notice nothing was changed from when we left. I asked WH were he slept Fri. night. WH said he went to meet OW and realized it was just infatuation and wanted now to work on our marrage. <p> But first they had sex twice between 6 & 11p.m. then OW had to go home to her husband. WH said it was after while they were talking that he noted a feeling of love was not there. I probably asked to many questions about details.<p> My name says much, but I couldn't leave and vent out my anger, kids were home. The last 6 months have been such a wild rollar coaster. I told him that I needed to hear him call OW or for our counselor to here WH tell the OW about his recommitment to his marrige and that he love us and hurt us terribly. Our appt. is in two days. I don't think WH was ready for that so soon. I also asked that he be tested for STD's since I did last time. I told him the only way I have been rationalizing WH A was to think of it as an addiction like alcohol. I don't know if he could see any parallels. <p> What I don't know is if WH is justing saying what I want to hear just to safe guard his fix.
WH said he would not call OW & if she called he would be busy & not take the call. I said I would control my rage & not call OWH. WH also asked if I could forgive him and I told him that I loved him but right now I was angry & in shock.<p>I asked how long he had been planning this get together and WH said it wasn't until Friday late morning. Know wonder he didn't return my call Friday afternoon. He was in his own little world.<p>
His conversation the night before (Thur.)with his D-20 didn't make one difference, she didn't want to discuss the A with me, but needed to tell her father how angry she was along with feeling so helpless. D is also seeing a counselor. D also wanted to know if WH has discussed more with S-15. Our counselors told me that it should be his responsibility to tell people and his family and that he needs to deal with the pain of his actions.

I can understand exploding! It sounds like your plan A is working - but he wants to be cake-man. I think you should prepare yourself for plan B if he doesn't satisfy your need for ending all contact. <p>What a crummy feeling you must be having right now.<p>(((exploding)))<p>TNT

Exploding <p>I can see why you are upset. Geez....<p>Are you familiar with the no contact letter suggested by Dr. Harley? When my H sent them to this OW'en it was like a gift from him to me. The letter expressly supports the BS and explains what you are saying you want him to tell the OW.<p>It would be better if he sent the letter and not talked to her. A conversation ones the lines of communication, even when it is meant to close them.