I love this forum because of all the support. But now, I feel like I'm writing a soap opera about my marriage!<P>In case you don't know, I left my H last weekend for home (ILLINOIS) intending to file for something and not come back. The torture was too great for me. My lawyer talked me out of it and said to call him and talk. We did and he told me at least 3 times to forget the affair, it's over. Ya, like I believe that one! Well, he also talked about other things that were very positive that we need to do to work out our marriage. He said that his family was the most important thing in his life now, including me (I asked). Well, came home not knowing what to expect.<P>The first day was slightly tense but we were able to talk without a feeling of "pressure", mostly because he had told me that he told OW he wanted his family and to reconcile his marriage. That took the shaking right out of my stomach. I actually feel like I'm gaining some weight back in the last 2 days. He came home early and actually had dinner with us!<P>Yesterday things only got better. I was freaking out because he was late home from work again. It was actually not that late and he was in such a good mood and had his normal happy greeting for me when he came thru the door "Hi MOM". I'm not imagining it. There's actually something back in his eyes! We've been smiling at eachother again. This morning he was as sweet as ever and said he was going to try to get out of work early. He reached over and KISSED me goodbye. He didn't have to - yesterday we just reached our hands out to eachother and said goodbye. He put his wedding ring back on. He's talking about some of the things we're going to do this winter (tobaggan runs that are close by).<P>I also got 2 hang up calls last night (I always answer the phone) and a strange woman called here yesterday right at dinner time and asked for my H, which I don't know what that was. My H asked who was calling and said he's sorry but he's sitting down to dinner with his family now. I haven't gotten hang up calls since I moved here so I think it's OW who is having a hissy fit, maybe. I hope so because my H is NOT going to like her calling his home and that works in my favor.<P>AM I DREAMING? I see my H back. I mean I really see the man I know seems to be returning. His eyes are alive again. It may be early yet and I can't trust it's finally over, but my arms are stretching to heaven and praising God. I believe HE is the right place to put all my trust!<P>God bless, pray! <P>--Kathy

Hurt Bad, it sounds so great! I can relate totally to this. The OW will continue to call until she understands that he means what he says, and it sounds like that. I knew my H had this determined look in his eye and he looked at me with that special light. I knew it was over and we could work on us again.<BR>I am not going to tell you it was all peaches and cream but I can tell you we are in a much better place than we have EVER been. Do the counselling, it's important for you to learn a little communication skills with each other, and it doesn't mean your crazy or anything, just concerned with keeping your marriage! And remember, you might have some pain and anger you need to deal with, do so up front so that it doesn't get buried and fester. I did a little festering on my own and it didn't help me much later on, I learnt the hard way to be as honest as possible in a much more gentle way! <BR>I am soooo happy for you.....Congratulations and God Bless! Don't forget we are still here if you should need some help along the way!<P>------------------<BR>Chick's <BR>Bren<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<P>

Hurt bad,<BR> This is GREAT news!!! I'm soooo happy for you!! Get to counseling RIGHT away!!<BR> My "new" theory is this is a "Tug of war between good and evil" God and Satan.<BR> Satan WILL tug back!! Make no mistake about that! I'm not trying to scare you but PLEASE start praying TOGETHER every night!!<BR> It would be great if H would start and you would add to it (watch LBs even in prayer.) Don't add to his guilt in prayer is what I mean. This is AWESOME. Good luck & Prayers Frank<P>------------------<BR>desperate<BR>"If yesterday didn't stop today, Why should TODAY stop tomorrow??" <BR>"Wisdom is why!!"<P>

Dear Hurt Bad:<BR>YEA!!!! I am so happy for you and your H. You are definately right when you say that God had something to do with it. Nothing is impossible if you put all of your faith in Christ. I am about where you are right now with my H. Took almost having to leave, knew that I did everything I possibly could to make my marriage work. I had no regrets. Fully aware that I could make it on my own and didn't want to live with the pain of knowing the OW was still in the picture. Prayed really hard to Jesus that night for my H's heart. I know that he heard me. Prayed alot before that too but felt that Jesus knew I had more lessons to learn about myself before he would give me what I had so longed for. I hope and pray for you both. Your H sounds recommited. My H said something that really made me think. He said, "It's so funny, with the affair, I was spiritually barren and you had to bring me back to my spirituality." I think they become so laden down with guilt that they become lost and don't think that they are worthy in Christ eyes to be loved By us showing them unconditional love we bring them back to Christ just by our actions. They again feel worthy to be loved. Not just by us but by Christ. I know you will make it!!!!!!!! Kellie