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Surviving An Affair
#2949046 02/13/03 06:03 AM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 125
A
awake
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awake
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A Offline
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 125
Has anyone ever given the book, Surviving an Affair, to a WS?

If so, what was the response?

Any ideas as to how a WS might respond to it? I would imagine it's an LB -- that might pique interest and get the brain spinning a little...

It's terrific. I was praying, "What happened? How could my wife do something like this? How could this be?"

And the book arrived in the mail. Of course, I ordered it as soon as I found out about the PA.

The situation with my wife is virtually identical to Jon, Sue and Greg...

Curious...

God Bless!

<small>[ February 13, 2003, 05:31 AM: Message edited by: awake ]</small>
Re: Surviving An Affair
#2949047 02/13/03 08:40 AM
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 15,310
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mimi_here Offline
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mimi_here
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In my sessions with Steve H. he said don't give them reading materials until they are out of the fog. He put it this way: "A teacher can't teach if there is no student". Your WS has to ready and able to learn. If the WS is not thinking rational, the learning material cannot be understood.

My WS is out of the fog, I think. So he has asked me for stuff to read. I did not initiate. Got it?

Best Wishes to You
Re: Surviving An Affair
#2949048 02/13/03 09:01 AM
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 441
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Krissee Offline
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Krissee
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I read SAA shortly after D-Day but I chose D-Day when I decided to confess to my H about the A. I would consider that I was still in semi-fog, but I think if someone had given it to me while I was in the A it wouldn't have helped. I would have thought that it didn't apply to me b/c my relationship with OM was different. (heard that before, right?)
Re: Surviving An Affair
#2949049 02/13/03 09:43 AM
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 240
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starving Offline
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starving
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 240
NC started in July and H finally read SAA in December. I told him it was helpful and just left it sitting out (for what seemed like years). H said he learned much from the book. In fact, a recent article appeared in our paper titled "Saving Your Marriage". He read the piece and pronounced it "stupid" because it didn't mention anything about POJA.
Hope this helps...other posters are right...don't beat spouse over the head with reading materials...major LB!

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