CAN I TELL, SHOULD I TELL. WHAT TO TELL.
My wh has always said that he (OW H) knew, guess what lie # 7654345678

OH I REALLY REALLY WANT TO TELL

Let me put this way: If the roles were reversed wouldn't you want the OW's spouse to tell you if you didn't know? I think the answer is yes.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by notgoingtodothis:
<strong>CAN I TELL, SHOULD I TELL. WHAT TO TELL.
My wh has always said that he (OW H) knew, guess what lie # 7654345678

OH I REALLY REALLY WANT TO TELL</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Do it ... why ? put the A in the day light. Your excuse ? ... easy, he knew (according to H) so no harm done to call him. Please do.

What to tell ... just tell him that your H has A with his W and acorrding to H you knew about this. What do you need to know ? .... He would try to verify your story, so be ready with facts, dates, places and so on. Tell him about this web site and tell him that you are fighting for your M.

Note: OM W is my best inside to OM in my case.
-rh-

<small>[ March 14, 2003, 02:26 PM: Message edited by: redhat ]</small>

Tell, tell, tell, tell! Oh, by the way...did I say "tell?" Tell him everything you know. He may not believe you, so give him all the facts. That way, even if he says he trusts OW, he will have the doubt and will begin his own checking into all of this. It will force OW into a VERY uncomfortable situation.

Of course, your WH will go ballistic. But at this point, let him. He will get a cold taste of reality because it will be very interesting to see if OW runs back to her marriage. To see how committed she is to your husband. He will quickly feel all alone.

As a matter of fact, this may force you into Plan B, if you arent already there. That way, he gets the Plan B letter, is having no contact with you and it appears you might be moving on, and at the same time, his "rock" is not helping him (the OW).

I say do it. The Harley's say this is the best. So go for it.

In His arms.

<small>[ March 14, 2003, 02:26 PM: Message edited by: Mortarman ]</small>

I agree with the above posts, I would tell him. He has every right to know what his W is doing.
Good luck and let us know what happens.
SH01

TELL!!

I told almost 2 weeks ago, see my thread "SH@#t has hit the fan".

I don't have proof yet, but all the anger, horrible remarks, phone calls from WH & OW over a 24 hr. period sure do point to their little fantasy world crumbling BIG TIME!

Already, the anger seems to have subsided, better phone conversations with WH...Now just waiting for the FOG to lift...

DO IT!! I felt better as soon as I did, I got tired of playing by their rules, and they had me convinced also that OW's H already knew.

HE had his suspicions but he knows Now!!

Good luck, you can weather what ever happens, but it does need to happen!

I'll be thinking of you.

In case you didn't understand the last few posts <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> , TELL the other BS! As RH suggested have your ducks in a row before you do it.

Hang in there.

-Luki

Ok..

The question has been answered.. But.. I can't resist responding.

TELL HIM!!!!

Be ready with the facts. You may have just found the salvation to your marriage. Oh HOW I wish OM was married in my case, so I could have a nice long discussion with OM W... I think that would make my world 1000% better right now.

Tell, tell, tell, tell! Oh, by the way...did I say "tell?"

I think you left out one more thing MM, TELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RH's advice is sound, make sure you know facts, if you sound vague he may think you are lying.

MTD

For some good posts on this subject, see all the links embedded in the link in my sig line.

Dear NGTDT,
I definitely think that the OW's H has a right to know. I wish I had know sooner that my ex was having an affair. I feel it is an honorable thing to do because your intent is to save a couple of marriages!
KK

TELL! My FWH was furious when I let OW's H have all their emails, told him where they'd stayed on their mutual vacations. Sic!
He told me I was a nasty *****! LOL Funny how OW are so saintly while helping and both lying, deceiving, and commiting adultery.
They only see us as being horrible!
Gosh, i'd want to know and I felt her H had every right to know his W was screwing my H or trying to, behind his back.
Perhaps My H was angry because OW's H finally ask for our phone number or for my H to call him. Then told him he'd fly out here and beat the Sh-- out of him if he contacted his W again.
That was after he'd kicked W out of the house. then she begged for second chance.
Oh yes, she and my H called me every name in book,but she did it to my H over phone at work. Not to me because she'd already had a dose of my wrath!
She told my H to watch his back with me. LOL
Oh how nice. A person who's coniving to get two divorces going, then the two of them marry and steal all assets both sides. And I'm the nasty bit--!
For gosh sake, don't wait another minute. TELL
LouLou