I have posted once in awhile - I noticed that I tend to come here between sessions with my IC when something is bothering me.

I guess this is a "trigger" - could be my imagination getting the best of me - or maybe something else?

My life in a nutshell.....WH had A with co-worker that ended 6 months ago. Recovery is hard, but WH seems committed to making the marriage work. WH and OW still work at the same place, but so far, we are doing OK. We are nowhere near "recovered" - WH still sleeps in the other bedroom and that bothers me. We do have SF, though, and I can tell that he is making an effort to open up about his feeling with me. My IC believes that we are making progess, albeit slow, and encourages me to keep working on myself and our marriage.

WH has earned a measure of my trust again - although I will admit that I still have reservations from time to time. The need to scour the cell phone bill, etc. I have found no evidence that WH has continued contact with OW - in fact his time, money, etc are accounted for and have been for quite some time. All signs are that the A is in the past and he has expressed regret and remorse that he allowed it to happen. In fact, in my heart, I have forgiven him and OW is really not an issue for me any longer.

Well, that's what I thought anyway. Today, WH gave me some entries for the NCAA office pool that we are involed with..... Last year OW had an entry (although I did not know about A at that time.) Of course, I wondered if she would have one this year...... Anyway, there are 3 generic entries from his workplace this year - I asked WH who they were and he said various people had chipped in for the entries as a group.

Now, for my question..... I am sure you can see it coming a mile away. Of course, I am beating myself up wondering if the entries are for OW. Should I question WH about it again? I do not want to jeopardize our fragile progress at this point, and I am usually sure that there is nothing to worry about regarding OW, but today I am questioning myself. Is this just a "trigger" and I should let it go - or ask WH about it further and take the risk of bringing up the A again?

Thanks for helping me "think before I act"......

WTW

<small>[ March 20, 2003, 12:00 PM: Message edited by: willingtowait ]</small>

Just ask plainly, "Is OW an entry?"

A simple question under the circumstance that they do still work together should not be a lovebuster.

Remember, honest answers should be greeted with composure. "How should we handle it?"

If he says no, say "I just wondered, she entered last year." And drop it...cuz there's no point to his lying, right, you'd find out?