I told her that I was moving out. Then, she just left the house while I was packing and went to her mothers house. I had the car all packed up with most of my belongings, said a lonely and tearful goodbye to the house, got in my car, when she called me on my cell phone and told me she needed me to babysit the 5 kids tonight because she had to work; and that she would be driving (from Southern Michigan to the tip of Florida)next week with the kids on spring break without me (due to my moving out) BUT she would like to buy me a ticket to London to see my friend??? I asked her to get a nanny like she said she would do that morning. She replied, I don't have time to interview the nannies for a possible hire, at least not for tonight---and I have to work. I told her to find someone that I am not available (due to the start of my plan B, where I am not there at all anymore). Furthermore, the ticket to London and Florida I passed on. So then we hung up the phone, I got my car going and before engaging the transmission to drive, It occured to me my wife is NOT operating with all her oars in the water....I thought, what in the heck, We can't afford for her to go to Florida alone driving with the 5 kids (ages 13 to 7)due to obvious SAFETY reasons and no way can afford for me to go to London for obvious financial reasons (we are poor due to kids education(we are pulling 2 kids out of private school due to costs), her borrowing $3,000 for attorney retainer from her mother which will probably equal $40,000 total tab for Both her and I's legal expenses for divorce! It was obvious, I could'nt possibly leave the kids with a mom that was willing to put this family into financial insecurity and physical harms way. It would be parentally irresponsible....To think I felt SAFE enough that she could be a good custodian just yesterday was faulty thinkging, indeed after today.

The problem is now: How do I do start a plan B without feeling that my kids are not safe alone with her poor poor judgement! I can't just start a plan B to have to just come back 4 nights per week so she can work....However, she served me with divorce papers (no fault in my state!!!) and I have probably anywhere from 6 months to 2 years before she gets custody and the house and I (a Mr. Mom) have to find a job!!!!! What to do????

0ct 01: discovered om was former college lover who got her pregnant and had baby put up for adoption before we got married (July 1986); I contacted om and told his w who was clueless; om promised not leave his wife and cease all contact with my wife.
Nov 01 started counseling; my wife unremorseful
Oct 02 new counselor: Harley's start plan A (I was never loved by my W because her lover called her 2 weeks before our wedding to tell her that he was available to marry her; she out of fear kept on with her wedding plans with me.
Mar 03 w served me divorce papers; she wants shared custody for me to spend the night in our house only when she works at night (I would come over at 6pm so she could work from 7pm to 7AM)