Hi I was introduced to this site by a friend.. here is my story...

My husband had a girlfriend 5 years ago, for sure he stayed with her for a year and a half, after that I didn't want to face reality, didn't find out anymore about her and we led separate lifes, together at home but just that. We didn't shared any activities together besides the ones required by family issues.
He never said he was sorry and I never forgave him. I took cover with my parents, brothers and sons. They filled my life.
What led to our separation: We spent January 2003, he at home, me, his parents, his sister and our kids away in another country, Our country was and is still in turmoil. We are living a very big and long crisis. When we all got back, in Frebuary, and I started telling my husband that if he was still having an affair that he should leave. In May he spent less and less time at home, just the nights. And he even started to get home at 5 or 6 in the morning (3 times). After that I started to feel sick, even trembling, I couldn't see clear and one morning I told him that this was insane, the only solution he suggested was that he should leave and so I agreed. That same night he talked to our kids and next morning he moved to an empty flat, just the bed. The next day he came to pick up his things. This has been hard, 7 weeks. There are days when I see no future in my life. I feel that marriage should be a commitment for life and you should always struggle for that ideal. I'm not sure if he is seeing someone now.
Sometimes I feel is all my fault. This should be a two way contract.
I haven't read that much about your theories. My kids and house won't let me that much spare time.
I even feel as to tell him to take care of the kids, I'm fighting a feeling that follows me since childhood, if someone doesn't love me then I won't love him, this applies to anyone. Now I am even taking this attitude towards my parents and brothers I don't want to be loved by anyone and so I won't love anyone.
I'm not sure what kind of information I should be writing in this post, feed me back

We all need and WANT to be loved. Plain and simple, do not make the mistake of turning those around you away from you out of anger or frustration, you need support, you need love to thrive as a flower needs rain...

First question is, do you want your marriage or not?

This should be answered with the understanding that marriages can be improved by following a recovery plan. But that it can be a lot of hard work.

If you don't, then maybe move on to the Divorcing board. I say maybe, because you can still get useful advice for dealing with other issues here. And you can discuss whether you do want your marraige.

wondering how you are doing? have you made any decisions? has anything changed?
keep posting and read the concepts on here.
Keep on keeping on..

maybe talk to a priest or minister and try to work through some of your emotions. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />