We have been married 22 years. This Christmas his children and mine our having Christmas morning at our house with my parents. His daughters are having Christmas Eve with their mother and want to bring her to Christmas morning at our house. He told his daughter yes, but I disagree I don't think she belongs with us. Help what do I do now?

I think it would be very gracious of you to invite his X-wife....

assuming your marriage has been a happy one for 22 years ....

what exactly are you worried about?

Pep

it seems there's a point here that's being overlooked.

Go ahead and tell his children that they have to tell their mother not to come to your house on Christmas even though they were told by their father that she was welcome. Then call your mother and tell her to stay home. Go visit her on Christmas eve just as they do. Then won't everyone be happy.

Why do you feel insecure after so many years?

My X and I spent every Christmas morning with his 2 girls, and his XW (W No1, in case you're confused!) for some 10 years. I never felt any problem with her being at my house or me being at hers, and the girls loved the fact they could have their true family around them - their Mum, their Dad and their other Mum (me).

Me and XW1 have since remained on good terms. During my DV she actually helped me a lot with some issues and I admire and respect the work she did in bringing up my 2 beautiful SDs - although I believe I had a hand in that too <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

This year will be the first year in 19/15 that X will not see his Ds at all on Christmas morning. The both still wanted to see me. I cannot believe how awful I would have felt to be denied the joy of sharing with them by XW1 inability to put aside anything other than their wellbeing.

This shouldn't be an issue for a couple of hours.

Wishing you well.
Lisa

I see no reason why she wouldn't be welcome unless you are insecure in your marriage. My x and his wife come to my house for all sorts of occasions and it is nice not only for the kids but for my x and i to be friends and his wife is wonderful as well. I love my husband and would never leave him for my X no matter what. The kids would be the only ones hurt if you say no, but I suggest you speak with your husband about your worries and such and see what you two can come up with TOGETHER!