I am a fashion nerd, but I know a “HOT” look when I see it. Perhaps that's the only realistic option??<P>You know I have this ongoing thing with my W & her “look.” Through our Counselor we will be trying to work out some guidelines – for me at least. The problem I’ve having is that I am not up on fashions & I want to be fair with my stated expectations. This will be upcoming topic in joint counseling session.<P>Historical Perspective: D/D 01/17/01 – Two OM aged 32 & 36 – W aged 48 – she had A 20 years ago – She states physical attractiveness as an important need – I’ve lost 25 lbs., color my hair & have short “punked-up” hair style, but I’m still 51! In causal conversation about lady “looks,” She said today that she used to be ashamed of her (34D) breast, but now she is becoming comfortable with her body (she lost 35 lbs. over last year & half). She now has large collection of Victory Secret, breast enhancing types of bras and matching thongs – coincidentally, this started soon after A’s started in July of 2000.<P>She on occasion will wear the V neck, tank top look, which in my opinion borders on the Hooter girl look, which I can say I have zero tolerance for. <P>If you watched Spin City last night, Heather was not wearing tank top things – pants were tight & top was also tight with definite focus on big breast and slim waist line. No low cut tank top look, but to me a very “HOT” look. This is her typical look<P>She has dress for a wedding we are attending in which she tried on a few weeks ago & I thought she looked great & I told her so. She commented that she needs to take it in some and I ask why it has to be so tight fitting. She responded that it is not “tight fitting, it needs to be form “fitted” look she is looking for? This seems to be her whole identity. She mentions today she will be altering this dress. I could almost stick two fingers between the dress & her waist – she wants it skin tight. Is one finger breathing room a fashion failure?<P>I am beginning to wonder if I am in fact being a real prude here. Is it totally out of style to wear cloths that are not so form fitted?? Am I asking my wife to dress as if she were in the 50’s here??<P>Where I work the receptionist is 80 & another gal is a little on the heavy side & wears loose fitting cloths. I do not have any real references as to alternatives dress styles for a lady with a great body. I guess her reference and seemingly strong focus is that she has a great body & sees no reason to hide it.<P>Are there realistic alternatives here? My counselor asked me to look through magazines and determine what looks I would be comfortable with. In a brief review of magazine covers, all the babes look hot with similar dress.<P>Sorry, I know I am betting this horse to death, but I need some fashion conscious advice here. I know the young girls have this look, but is it essential for ladies in mid to late 40’s? Is there a magazine that would show stylish women with less provocative look?<BR>Thanks!<BR>HH<BR>