Ok, tonight we are once again poised to have the separation talk. A quick recap of my post yesterday--it's her wanting the separation, not me, and she wants me to move out of the house and get an apartment while she "sorts things out" and finds herself.<P>She had an EA that did go physical but in our few couseling sessions, it was apparent that it was more EA. I was convinced that that was over for awhile and now she's just trying to right the ship with the rest of her life. She's very smart, good career etc, but I've done everything around the house, with bills etc while maintaining my career (thank God for being in sales) through all of this.<P>She has said that there is no reason for her to be around because I do it all so consequently, she's never home. At first I suspected the OM was the cause, but at this point, Im not so sure. I think it may be more of the avoidance principle. Her behavior now is a lot different that when she was seeing him and we have had numerous good times and numerous miserable nights (me sitting out on the deck, cigar in hand, wandering what time she will show up and what excuse it will be why she's late).<P>Initially, when we talked the first time, I told her that I wasn't about to move out and that if she needed to "find herself" then she should find herself an apartment and realize what she is missing. Last night it got ugly but today she is back to being semi-normal. I still say if she needs the separation for the benefit of getting emotionally healthy, having goals, making inroads on her life (which her counselor admits is important) etc, then it's her that goes, not me. <P>Thanks for the posts on the orginal thread, this is helping me tremendously.<P>guidobalata
