This has probably been asked in one way or another before but it feels unique to me. Long story but will try to cut is short. I am in love with my wife who does not love me. We have been getting along cordially at home but she has no emotional feelings for me. It is not about infidelity. I have hurt her with all the love busters and after 16 years of marriage and 2 kids she is not in love at all. She reluctantly agreed to do the MB course, although we had talked about it is was still a surprise and a Valentines day gift she did not like. We have for the past 4 years read books and briefly went to consoling, which she did not like and eventually quit. I moved out of the house 2 months ago and we began dating again, she became more relaxed and agreed to restart the MB course. We are just starting the lesson on angry outburst and since starting the MB lessons she has grown more distant and is close to quitting and filing for divorce. In the last 4 years she admits i have made very good progress on changing my behavior, but since starting MB she does not believe or want to apply the learned lessons to her. When talking about disrespectful judgements she admitted to ridicule but sees or hear nothing else. Her statements was something to the effect that we just have different perspectives and i do not agree with yours. She states that i am not really hurting her anymore she is just unhappy. She would like to be in love with me but does not see how it can happen. She will not let me meet any emotional need that she has and would rather not talk about it. She is in a place that is impossible to reach. She does not like the of using her intelligence to override her emotions. We have spent 4 weekend anyway and she says she feels briefly better, but once back the the everyday life we spend less time and attention on this. We are spend most of our time 11-15hrs a week doing the course, eating supper together, an occasional recreational activity and talking on the phone. Any suggestions??

Hi Texas Skies, welcome to Marriage Builders. How are you doing the MB course? Are you signed up for the online course?

What would she say are your greatest lovebusters? When was the last time you committed a lovebuster and what was it?


How much time every week do you actually spend on UA time? Out on dates?