|
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4
Junior Member
|
OP
Junior Member
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4 |
Please pray that my husband will realise his words are wrong. He calls me names, dumb idiot stupid and is physically rough with me at times
He said yesterday that his anger towards me is actually the Lord's anger for me coming through him
He said i should be scared the way I talk to him, because the Lord speaks very clearly to him.
He makes me feel like the Lord approves of him, not ne.
He's said in the past that because he knows the Lord, because he is disappointed in me, so is the Lord. He said yesterday that I am a disappointment.
Please pray that I will know if this is true, that I will know how the Lord feels about me. Please pray that I will hear what the Lord wants me to do and that I will hear His voice clearer.
He wants me to dress in sexy things, most especially at night but I like wearing flannel at night. In addition, it's hard being affectionate with someone who calls you so many names. I was at the beginning affectionate but now it's hard so he says I am a cold dush, and that maybe I'm a lesbian and prefer girls. I am not!
Yesterday he said if someone called him names like he does to me, he'd work hard to prove to them that they were not the things that they were saying. It's like is he hoping to motivate me by calling me names to show him I am not these things
He says he's not the one who should change.
I have no one around me who knows he treats me this way and he keeps saying things like everyone knows I am dumb, he makes it sound like everyone would side with him.
No one would believe me because in public he praises me and is the loving husband, a man of God.
Now I am not perfect and have said things in anger I regretted but I am usually the one apologizing first and him after hours of at all.
He has said I was fat and ugly in a previous argument but now denies it.
Yesterday he compared me to a 31 year old girl who had kids on her 20s and lost weight saying that I was not determined and had no goals. I'm 47 this year, tired, and the weight doesn't come off easily, it barely budges despite the fact that I cut out so many things. In my 30s it fell off like water.
Please pray that I would have desires, goals, passion
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 789 Likes: 4
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 789 Likes: 4 |
On my way home (a 3 your drive), I pulled over to park and pray for you.
I am praying for you to run for your life, away from this abusive manipulator. Nothing he says comes from God. You are not safe.
How is your situation, do you have children together? Do you have relatives nearby?
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 789 Likes: 4
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 789 Likes: 4 |
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Please pray that my husband will realise his words are wrong. He calls me names, dumb idiot stupid and is physically rough with me at times Hi Blue, your husband is not a safe person and you need to plan to get away from him asap. You cannot resolve marriage problems with a person who is physically and verbally abusive. The most critical step for you is to get safely away and stay away until he has successfully completed anger management and demonstrated at least a year of dramatically changed behavior. Do you have a safe place you can move? Do you have children? How long married? Do you work outside of the home?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 80
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 80 |
Hello, Blue, and welcome to the MB forums. You will find much excellent counsel and support here. I echo Goody's sentiments on this. You can't hope that your husband will see that he is wrong. Abusers have an exaggerated sense of entitlement. Only his feelings and needs matter in his worldview. Run from this dangerous man as though your life depended on it! The King of Kings does not want His daughter belittled, torn down, or abused in any way. To clarify what abuse is, Dr. Harley defines it as deliberately hurting another person. Praying that you find peace and freedom from this terrible prison that your marriage has become.
Every man dies. Not every man truly lives.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4
Junior Member
|
OP
Junior Member
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4 |
Thanks for your prayers.
Friday night when I came home my husband was in tears apologizing, saying he was a viscous husband and that he cannot expect me to be like him.
I think the Lord spoke to him. I just hope it was genuine, he never in tears apologized before
I have to get my eyes off my husband and back onto the Lord.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4
Junior Member
|
OP
Junior Member
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4 |
No children and I don't work outside the home. I work with my husband.
Almost 5 years married.
I don't want my marriage to fail, because it will bring shame to Jesus. Everyone I told about Jesus will think, see Jesus can't even give you a good marriage or help you with your marriage.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Blue, did you see our advice to separate from your husband? He is a very dangerous person and you should not be with him until he has gone through anger management training and has demonstrated at least of year of anger free behavior. He is DANGEROUS. We are not going to support you in your bad decision to stay in an abusive marriage.
Jesus sent you to this forum for help. Don't ignore the warnings.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 789 Likes: 4
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 789 Likes: 4 |
Thanks for your prayers.
Friday night when I came home my husband was in tears apologizing, saying he was a viscous husband and that he cannot expect me to be like him.
I think the Lord spoke to him. I just hope it was genuine, he never in tears apologized before
I have to get my eyes off my husband and back onto the Lord. Your husband is manipulating you. If you accept this abuse, it will be be likely you accept it next time. Tears don't mean a thing. Actions is what you are looking for and change in behaviour. Don't be fooled.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2018
Posts: 2
Junior Member
|
Junior Member
Joined: Nov 2018
Posts: 2 |
Jesus wants you to be safe and live and peace. Jesus is the Prince of Peace. Remember that. Save yourself.
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
0 members (),
1,097
guests, and
63
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|