She's also said something about me tracking her every move.

Her oldest sister tried to give her some advice tonight:

"Why a tow truck? Sarah, have you thought about keeping your marriage together and your family intact? Divorce sucks. Dual parenting outside a marriage sucks. Not having your kids on holidays sucks. Dating sucks. New relationships with outside baggage sucks. It all sucks and it's hard. I've experienced it, I know. You seem to be looking through rose colored glasses that there is going to be this incredible amicable relationship with Jon. Don't you remember how much mom & dad fought when we were little? They didn't always get along. Even now I hear the resentment in dad's voice. Additionally, you've compromised it with infidelity. Can't you guys see a pro-marriage counselor and work on keeping it together? Rather than one trying to help you pull it apart "amicably"? Which is a joke.... divorce is not amicable. It's destructive to your spirit, it's destructive to other relationships, it's destructive to kids , it's destructive financially. It's [censored]. The grass isn't greener on the other side. If I could tell you one thing this is it.... marriage is better than divorce. I love you. I think you're making a mistake and I wish you would reconsider."

My wife's reply: " thank you for offering your opinion" and "vomit, that is what i have had to choke down to be a good wife to Jon. I'm tired of choking down vomit. i am divorcing him"

Yikes

I think you might have killed this affair. That is why she is so hot. She was still seeing him all this time.

I SERIOUSLY DOUBT this is the first time they have communicated since Sept 28. I bet they have been in touch the whole time which explains why she is not in withdrawal. She wasn't this bad before, but she is FURIOUS NOW because you have really interrupted her affair. Just keep a close eye on her and I bet you see this again. Look for her to get more sneaky, like parking her car, leaving her phone in the parking lot and going somewhere with the OM.

It would sure be nice if OM's wife would help you. Maybe you could inspire her to help her if you told her something like this:

"I want you to know I am very concerned that this affair is really over. She is very much in love and addicted to your husband according to some things she has written and said to her friends. This affair is not over for her. Her friends are very supportive and encouraging of her affair. I have seen some suspicious things but one of the biggest red flags is the complete absence of withdrawal. That led me to believe they were still in touch so I started watching. Sure enough, I catch her going to the OM's office. I am telling you this so you can watch from your end. I promise to let you know if I see anything but I predict this is far from over based on the things she is telling her friends. I can't save my marriage as long as OM is still in the picture."

How do you think she would react if you sent that?

I think you might have killed this affair. That is why she is so hot. She was still seeing him all this time.

Wow, just wow! What a great sister! Many BS would have LOVED to have a sister-in-law who was such a strong supporter of the marriage. Your WW is getting a strong dose of reality from her sister, I hope it continues! It's especially helpful because your SIL has been through a divorce and can speak to WW with authority on the subject.

I think you might have killed this affair. That is why she is so hot. She was still seeing him all this time.

[


I want to believe this...except that she's telling her friends that she hasn't been in touch with him. That would mean that she's lying to her closest friends and while I accept that she's actively lying to me, it's hard to see that with her friends. But I may be naive here.

"I know you are all about signs, so interpret this... I stopped bu Lincolns work to drop off a letter. Left it on his windshield. He saw and came out to parking lot. While we were talking there was a loud pop and my car started to smoke. Called a tow truck, found a sunny place to sit. While waiting a student from RHS recognizes me- Yousif. Found another place to sit and there is a package of Parliment cigarettes on the ground. Parliments were my closest grandmas favorite brand to smoke."

On Sept 28 OM asked me not to contact him. i respected his wished until today when i left a letter on his windshield. i had some things that need to be said for my own personal clousure. unfortunately my car broke and OM saw out the window, he offered to call AAA, i declined, he went back to work. i went and found a place to sit in the sun while i waitrd for a tow truck. sorry

Where did she lie to her friends? When she texted her friend that day, she said:


She told the OM's wife that she had not contacted him which is what they want her to believe.
Is there more you haven't posted?

[


Well, yes, there's lots of texts that I haven't posted, though I have referred to them as I did above by noting that in her texts to some of her friends she's telling them that that they haven't been in contact. I cited this during the exposure window where once she had heard I was calling and texting people she was telling them how they hadn't been in contact.

Watching her texts and email and calls I haven't seen contact between September 28 and Friday. It could be because there wasn't contact or I didn't have full access to all means of communication or they were doing it in person.

[quote=DrDetroit24][


Well, yes, there's lots of texts that I haven't posted, though I have referred to them as I did above by noting that in her texts to some of her friends she's telling them that that they haven't been in contact. I cited this during the exposure window where once she had heard I was calling and texting people she was telling them how they hadn't been in contact.

On Friday night I changed the password to our joint bank account. I did so that she couldn't detect the savings transfer to my sole savings account and so she couldn't initiate any financial transaction while that savings transfer was pending. My rationale here is that her continued deception and lying to the kids and I about the OM means that I cannot trust her and because I cannot trust her and will not pay for our divorce, I've emptied out nearly all the savings and changed my direct deposit.

I would be very careful here because a judge will make quick work of you over stuff like this. He won't care that she has been deceptive. I would refigure this and put some of the money back in your savings. Take out any money you have put aside for your kids and then split the rest of your savings in half. Everything else is good.

Yep. With the convo tonight I'll figure out exactly how much is the boys and how much ours is and split ours in half.

I would give her all of that. She is entitled to all that documentation so dragging your feet is no benefit and will just aggravate her for no reason.