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Joined: Dec 2016
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*Dr. Harley. Sorry for the typos.


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Please focus on what is legally the smartest thing to do.

Do you have your evidence of her financial wrongdoings well organised and presentable?

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Originally Posted by goody2shoes
Please focus on what is legally the smartest thing to do.

Do you have your evidence of her financial wrongdoings well organised and presentable?

Yes, I do have.


BH(me)-48 WW-43
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Update: We have settled for joint legal and physical custody(50/50). Judge forced us to make settlement with the children's lawyer.

It seems the judge did not want to make the decision for fear of an appeal especially after he supported the scam lawyer who represented and duped me.

WW wanted this 50/50 joint settlement to protect herself from all the bad things she had done in the last 6.5 years which made her not deserve full custody. If it had been me(as a minority male) who had done these things I certainly would have lost custody.

As for me I am a minority male and that certainly does not help and has proven not to help.

Next steps:
1. The judge asked us to come up with a decision on what we wanted to do with the house.
2. I am planning to expose about the funds she took this Monday. I have drafted the exposure but it is long. I could not find a lawyer to receive the funds from her relatives she the funds to in escrow. Children's lawyer said she is not authorized. I cannot figure out the freeze in situ. So, I do not know where I should say they should sent the funds to.


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Originally Posted by WierdSituation
Update: We have settled for joint legal and physical custody(50/50).

That is generally the best for children. You can always quietly spend more time with them if that is what they wish, just don't bring attention to it so that they do not become a battle ground.

Originally Posted by WierdSituation
As for me I am a minority male and that certainly does not help and has proven not to help.

Can't imagine how that would make any difference to anything. Courts tend to favour mothers which is a pity as fathers make great single parents especially for boys.

Originally Posted by WierdSituation
Next steps:
1. The judge asked us to come up with a decision on what we wanted to do with the house.

So judge is asking you to come up with a proposal. Always ask for a bit more than you would be happy to settle for.

Originally Posted by WierdSituation
2. I am planning to expose about the funds she took this Monday. I have drafted the exposure but it is long. I could not find a lawyer to receive the funds from her relatives she the funds to in escrow. Children's lawyer said she is not authorized. I cannot figure out the freeze in situ. So, I do not know where I should say they should sent the funds to.

Not sure I understand this. Do you have a judgment against her for the money? Unless you have a judgement or the person holding the funds is willing to hand over the money, you will not be able to either escrow or freeze it. I don't think you can do this without legal help. Your local Bar Association should be able to help you find someone who will either work pro bono or cheaply and those lawyers are generally very honest.

In addition, if the money is overseas, you will need to get local legal help to enforce the judgement which will involve knowing exactly where the money now is (bank and account number).


3 adult children
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Thank you so much re: about custody.

Thanks, good to know about male/female and that it has nothing to do with being a minority.

I had not thought about this. I will will say 60% of the house proceeds because she has been staying there for free. What she would have paid as rent would have been $320k. What do you think?

I do not have a judgement. the perkins are not willing to give back the money. I will seek legal help through BAR and look for any other proper channels. The money is in the USA.


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Originally Posted by WierdSituation
Thank you so much re: about custody.

Thanks, good to know about male/female and that it has nothing to do with being a minority.

Your custody result is close to ideal; no payments mean no conflicts.


Originally Posted by WierdSituation
I had not thought about this. I will will say 60% of the house proceeds because she has been staying there for free. What she would have paid as rent would have been $320k. What do you think?

If she is living there now and the house cannot be divided, it will need to be sold. Then ask for the amount of 'free' rent to be deducted from the proceeds before dividing the remainder amount 50:50. You don't want to own 60% of the house your ex wife is living in, that would be a terrible mess. She would owe you rent that she would never pay.

Originally Posted by WierdSituation
I do not have a judgement. the perkins are not willing to give back the money. I will seek legal help through BAR and look for any other proper channels. The money is in the USA.

The fact that the money is in the US is very helpful. Find a lawyer through your local Bar - you are in NYC if I recall and they are excellent. In the meantime pull together all the records you have that show the movement of money out of marital savings and where it went. You will probably need to subpoena destination bank records, that is not expensive but if the money is in another state you may need a local lawyer.


3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
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