Thanks for the compliment NSR/Jim<P>God, have I learned a lot.<BR>I implemented Plan B yesterday, H would have got the last loving letter today.<BR>I've been trying so hard to deposit love units, and to let him know that I still love and care for him, but a ph call nearly blew it.<BR>H rang to speak to d, she was in bath, so I asked could we discuss her school enrolment. She is just about to start prep - her first year at school. His respose was "if you're quick" (He was at dinner with his parents, and he later told me that he thought it would be rude to have a conversation with me at that time!!)<BR>I told him to F... Off.<BR>I decided that too many more ph calls like that would undo all the work I've been trying to do, so plan B it was.<BR>I wrote a loving letter - one that was posted here - and also told him over the ph. that I was stopping all communication with him. Told him he can still call for the girls but at certain times so I know not to ans the ph. I also let him know via the ph call that I loved him, but that I couldnt take the emotional rollercoaster ride anymore. I was getting off. I could hear the sadness in his voice when he said "I guess it had to come to this."<P>I feel quite at peace with myslef and the world today, I made a decision that I'm comfortable with. Hopefully, it will make him realise what we had, and what we could have again.<P>I thank God every minute of every day that I found this site. You guys are angels from heaven, I don't think I would've made it without you all.<P>Thank you.<P>Jo

Hello Bonnet,<P>Amzing that on two continents our e-mai times seem similar. where is the letter you posted. am gettin beter at manuevering on site but still easier if you tellme post.<P>Glad you felt some peace with decision. <P>Melissa

Jo,<P>Your more than welcome...<BR>I've seen your frantic days when you've first came on to this forum... and I've seen you've slowed your mind down to where you can start trying the principals of Dr. Harley. Good for you. Did you ever get a copy of "Surviving an Affair" or any of the other books? <B>The books</B> are really going to help you! I hope you can get them where your at.<P>I am not in Plan B yet... I've done too much love busting before I came to this site (MB) so I need more time in Plan A... and I do have the patience for it... most of my friends say <B>too much</B> patience. When I get there with you in Plan B, I know it will be hard...<P>I'll just want to hear her voice... once...<BR>I'll just want to see her face... once...<BR>I'll just want to know what she's doing... once...<P><B>AND</B>... I'll have to forget about all of it!<P>Remember... in Plan B there is <B>No Contact</B>... That is to save your love bank for your H! But... it is also for the harder step of possibly having to move on... There is a chance your H will live in a phantasy world forever... While in Plan B you work on <B>yourself</B> and your kids obviously... But, if he doesn't snap out of it... by working on yourself... you be ready to phase him out of your life completely. Plan B isn't going to force him to come back to you... but just that has happened to many people... since the guilt gnaws harder when the "silent treatment" is given.<P>Keep posting...<P>Prayers for now... {{{{{hugs}}}}} when you hit those hard days of "needing" your H. The people on this board will be life savers... <P><BR>Oh... Melissa...<BR>The letter Jo was refering to was the letter you give your S when your are about to start Plan B... the post that you can find it under is <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum1/HTML/009414.html" TARGET=_blank>I too have PLAN B questions</A>. btw when you want to find a specific "topic" that you think may have already been posted, use the "Search" at the very top of the page... I've found very useful in refreshing my memory of things I've posted and read previously.<P>Prayers for you too! <P>Jim