A kind of imbarassing question that hopefully will get some helpfull responces.<BR>Im separated from my husband, going on 3 months. We separated because of abuse. I<BR>still love him, but not the same as when we first got married.<BR>The last 3 years of our marriage I totally lost interest in sex. I would cringe at just the very thought of his touch. But since we have been separated, I can't think about anything elce but sex.<BR> I married him 11 years ago a virgin. I have never really BEEN with anyone elce. Now everything I do, everywhere I go, I find myself flirting, and trying extra hard to look good to get attention. I have even had new experiences with my girfriend. Why am I<BR>feeling this way? Im still married, and I know that It's considered an affair untill we are divorced, but That doesn't even seem to be affecting my judgement. Could I be doing<BR>this just to get back at him?? <P>------------------<BR>Rainy

Rainy,<P>How long have you been separated? Do you have a legal separation? Do you plan on getting a divorce?<P>I know many others on the list will disagree with me, but if you are legally separated and intending on divorcing, then I don't think what you are doing is an affair. Dangerous and irresponsible maybe. Have you thought about STD's? Hopefully you consider that and practice safe sex.<P>As far as what is <B>causing</B> you to act that way, well it could be just the fact that you are "free" now. Your sexuality has been repressed so long and it's finding its way out. I'm probably gonna be in the minority on this one, but I don't think that's all that weird myself... as long as you're careful (as I said above).<P>--andy

Airheart,<BR>Yes, divorce is definatlly in the works. I can't ever go back, im too afraid. We have been married for 11 years, and separated 5 times in between. The abuse has been ongoing for 10 of those years. I am cautious about the STD's and all the other scary things that revolve arround dating in the 90's now. Thank-you for your reply.<P>------------------<BR>Rainy