OK, to all who ministered me through my self-wallowing and pity jag last night....<P>I AM alive, but it hurts like hell!! <P>as new_beginning would say...<P>"BAD, BAD Roll Me Away!" <P>OK, I will tell you this...I WON'T be doing this again any time soon!<P>Thanks for the love and support!<P>Roll Me Away

Glad to hear you are alive. Sorry you are so hung over. Hope you get to feeling better. I'll email you later todayor tonight. Take it easy to day.<P>------------------<BR>di<P>

Diana,<P>I wrote you an epistle last night. It was good to get all this weirdness off my chest. I think I was feeling so "emotionally used" and manipulated and it just all hit me.<P>THANKS for being there and being supportive!<P>I am going shopping with S later this morning. He is actually Jim's oldest S who is living here with ME. We are very close and he wants to spend the day with me, so I am looking forward to it. I don't know when we will leave, but I will be back on when I get home later.<P>Yeah....my head hurts alot!<P>Desiree

Now take a glass of tomato juice and toss two aspirin in your mouth... pour the juice over your head and hop in the shower... that should get ya back to normal!!!<P>~Sheryl<P>------------------<BR>Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you are among the stars!!

new_beginning:<P>Sheryl, won't you stay and play with us?????? We will miss your humor sooooooo much!!!!!<P>Luv Ya,<P>Roll Me Away

Desiree, How is the hangover? Are you feeling any better? Glad I could be there for you last night. It is nice to have friend that understand. I am sure I will be calling on you next.<P>------------------<BR>di<P>

Diana, <P>I have some vestiges left...this was a doozey! Jim showed up here today - for 2 1/2 hrs. It is driving me crazy! He doesn't want to be with me - I think he is feeling guilty about going to FL next week to be with OW for Thanksgiving. He just "hung around". How can I avoid him if he shows up??? I was nice, but basically avoided him as much as possible. It is this kind of contact that keeps me off-balance - disoriented and confused. And, it is not as if he can hang around here and then it will all be better or OK about the affair!?!? I wonder if he thinks that sometimes??<P>At first, I thought that this must mean he still cared - coming by, wanting to be in contact with me, etc. But, I have realized I was just looking at the trees and missing the forest! He spends 80% of his time in FL or with OW since he left this second time. He never calls me. He does come here for the office and once in a while like today drops in. It really is meaningless and I have just come to terms with that. I think he does have an ulterior motive in that he wants to keep me "dangling on the hook" or maybe he wants to still "feel the sense of family". Anyway, I am trying to work through this...<P>Thanks for ALL your support. Did you read my e-mail?<P>Desiree

I envy you, I haven't had any mind or mood altering substances in my body for three years. However for me all drinking would do is make me act like I did when I was in active addiction, not apretty sight. So far througfh all of this HELL I have not had an obsession to use. Life on lifes terms is a *****, and I can't numb my feelings. So I have to ride them out they usually pass within in an hour or so and I can function as a normal human being agai, for a while anyway. <P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

RMA,<P>I'll always look for your posts... whenever I drop by! You probably haven't visited my latest thread lately (why would ya, after all?) but someone asked me a question that was kinda hurtful. I don't want to visit that kind of emotion right now. So, I will come by, look for you and several others who care about me and who I care about, but stay away from unknowns. I can't stand being hurt anymore.<P>Love ya too <P>------------------<BR>Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you are among the stars!!

Yes I read your email I'll writ e you one back tomorrow. Tonight my daughter and I wemt out to eat and I drank my first drink on an empty stoach so it hit a little hard plus I am ready to go to bed but my son-in-law is watching a movie (Isleep on the hide a bed in the living room where the TV is. SO I am propping my eyes open but my brain has gone to bed. I'll email you later.<P>------------------<BR>di<P>

Sheryl,<P>I hope you will catch this. Yes, I did see your other post and will post there again. I already had. <P>Each person in life must find his or her OWN way. What workis for one doesn't necessarily work for another. I wish everyone would be CONSIDERATE and SUPPORTIVE. After all, isn't that why we are here - no really looking for "pat answers", because there are none. Just each of us seeking a "safe" place to vent and compassion and understanding from others who can truly understand our whirlwind of emotions.<P>You have given it the good fight. You have suffered through BOTH affairs. I will not judge you at all. I will only say that i will MISS you. You are a kind and SENSITIVE soul who has touched the hearts of so many here, including me. <P>But, the door is open for you to still come by and "play" with us once in a while. I think right now you need a MUCH DESERVED BREAK from even thinking about all this.<P>Sheryl, your GOODNESS, KINDESS and COMPASSION shines through...<P>God bless! <P>Desiree

Desiree,<P>Yes, I checked in, and am amazed at the compassionate responses I saw!! Many, many wonderful words, some from people I have never seen posting before.<P>As far as what you've written here: my gosh, I can't possibly live up to that!! You are far too kind, I think!!<P>Thank you from the bottom of my heart, and I was serious when I said I'd check in and look for you!!! <P>~Sheryl<P><P>------------------<BR>Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you are among the stars!!