My spouse and I have been married less than 5 years. Over the last few years we have both had an "affair".<P>I'm looking back at our history, and wondering, if this has happened, are we really "soulmates"; is this the right person for me, and am I the right person for him?

mr;<P>You're asking the wrong question. <P>You should ask yourself---do I have the skills necessary to have a successful marriage, and does my spouse??<P>And, of course, the answer is "no".<P>I'd suggest that you take the time to read this site from top to bottom. Start with "Concepts", and learn about the Four Rules for Successful Marriages. Then read the articles and Q&A columns---there's enough there to keep you busy for weeks.<P>The bottom line is that if you and your husband would take the time and effort to learn and practice the four rules for successful marriages:<P>1. Protection (avoid lovebusters---don't be the cause of your spouse's unhappiness)<P>2. Care (meet emotional needs---contribute to your spouse's happiness)<P>3. Honesty (complete, total)<P>4. Time (spend 15 hrs/week together, meeting each other's needs)<P>...you will have a successful marriage with lots of romantic love. If you continue down your current path, you'll hop from "soulmate" to "soulmate" in an endless string of broken relationships.<P>Relationships (marriages) take skills and effort. You need to learn the skills, and put in the effort. The rewards are well worth it!