I am very embarrassed to post this, but I will. Both my fiance and I have terrible temperments especially when we lose things. When he is with me, he says that he controls himself much better than when he is alone. Mine is just the opposite. When I am alone, I am perfectly fine and very patient. I go about searching for the lost item or whatever is making me upset and I show no signs of anger. However, when he is around, I blow my top looking for whatever I am looking for. Then later I am totally embarrassed by my behavior and apologize to him. Subconsciously, I am trying to figure this out and am wondering if I am doing it for his attention, even though I feel I am not. I do everything in my power to control myself, and I still blow my top. Is there anyone else out there that behaves this way too? If so, could you tell me your key to solving this idiotic behavior. I try to catch myself doing it, and I still carry on like a jerk. When growing up at home, I behaved the same way in front of family members, but once again, when I was alone, I was fine. How can I learn to grow up and control myself? When it's that moment in time, I don't care about anything else and only "see" rage. If you have any suggestions, please let me know.

Hi Crh, <P>I can certainly relate to your anger issues. Is this a problem only when you've lost something, or are there other times it comes out? Is it the same reaction around your fiance and around your family, or different? And here's a biggie: do you have the same reaction when your fiance and HIS family are both around? If yes to the last question, I'd suggest anger management counseling. If no, it's more likely to be a conditioned response that could be modified by substituting different behaviors for the stimulus.