I need advice from people who are dealing with a spouse who has separated from them due to a mid-life crisis (no adultery involved) and who are being treated for depression. My H has many issues that he is dealing with such as overly-controlling parents (even now at the age of 45), lack of self-esteem, the need to fill his life with younger friends (male) because he lacked them in his childhood, a a mid-life crisis that has him participating in biking and canoing activities which at times have been dangerous. (He almost lost his left ear in a biking accident where they had to life flight him to the nearest hospital off of a mountain. Other various falls and injuries) My husband has made the decision to leave me and the children to "find himself." He now questions the reason he married me 22 years ago (fear of losing me) at the age of 23 and laments he became a father too soon. (at the age of 24 1/2). Other grievances have been that I didn't buy him his low calorie cranberry juice......neglecting the fact that he never asked me to get it, I was suppose to know.) Any advice from someone who has had a similar circumstance?

Donna,<P>I'm sorry to hear what's going on in your life right now. <P>Welcome to MB! You'll find a lot of supportive and good people here going through a lot of pain and regular life too. I hope you've taken some time to read the articles and ideas that the Harley's espouse since they'll help you understand what people are talking about and help you work on your relationship with your husband and approach your situation.<P>I don't have a similar experience to yours but I wanted to suggest that maybe you'd post your story in the Emotional Needs Forum area. Pre-marriage and the Early Years might not be the best fit for you, but most of all it isn't as well populated as the EN Forum is. There isn't a particular forum dedicated to mid-life crisis. These experiences are strewn across the board. I would suggest you read in the In Recovery section (after reading the MB concepts) as you'll find mid-life crisis' (MLC's) in there. You might want to start your posting in EN forum first though if your marriage isn't In the Recovery area, but there are nice people in both and feel free to do as you feel led.<P>God bless and welcome!<P>HM