I'm new here. I've been in a long term relationship with the most wonderful man. We connected right from the start. About two years ago I ended it because I couldn't handle the feelings. He was so very much in love with me that he never leftt my side and I needed a bit of space having recently ended a 10 year marriage. To make a long story short last August I went to see him and tell him how much I missed having him in my life. From that moment we were together. About three weeks ago he and I made plans for the evening and he never showed or called. He's a conflict avoider. He knew I was upset and chose to run away from dealing with t he problem of him standing me up. He fell asleep on the couch. I believe him. No big deal. But the problem was the lack of respect in him not calling me. When we finally did talk a few days later I asked him about it. I told him thhe least he could do was respect me enough to call. He shut down. When we finally did get together I asked him about it. He shut down again and said we shouold stop seeing each othere. Here is a man who I know is faithful. I don't believe there is another woman. But now he's running away. e's totally shut down. I really don't know what to do. What we have is incredible. I'd really hate to lose it forever. Anyone have any advice? I love this board as it is the place where I read so much about love relationships and beliefs much like my own. I hope to gain wisdom from those who visit here.

You claim that his standing you up was not a big deal. But obviously it was, or else you wouldn't have mentioned it twice (if I understand your post correctly).
I could come up with a million maybes, but I think you should ask him why he doesn't want to see you anymore. <p>cheers, <p>Anise

BlossomCherry,<p>I think he may still be feeling a little hurt from the first relationship. It sounds as if he truly cares, but he is scared of you which is not a good thing. You sound like me, We both tend to wear the pants in the relationship, but sometimes we put to much pressure on the other person and without knowing it make them feel bad.<p>So my advice is, give him a break. Write him a letter in a few days and tell him how you feel.
Take it easy and don't let little things bother you.
Not calling is rude for us, because it's something we would not do. But everyone has there faults. I had to get used to J running late for EVERYTHING it's just him.
So write a letter, tell him how you feel, give him a call and avoid putting him down and complaining.