Hello, everyone. I'm having a problem. My wife is overweight and I don't know how to help her to lose it. She's extremely emotional. As she should be I guess. We've spent alot of money on equipment, diet gimmicks, and gym memberships, but none of that stuff works. Well, it will only work if you do it, but she doesn't. She actuallly loses motivation by going to the gym. There aren't many people at the gym that are really overweight. The majority are just there to stay fit and the flaunt their bodies. Basically, it doesn't reflect the real world. On top of this we're kinda new to the area and don't really know alot of people, so she has no girlfriends with whom she can relate and possibly become a workout partner with. I'm not off the hook in all this though. Before we got married everything was fine. There never was that much concern about her weight. She was still overweight, but she has since gained alot since we got married. I'm thinking it may be contributed to birth control pills possibly. Anyway, like I said before, I'm not off the hook. One time my wife caught me looking at another. That was a bad move, but it wasn't even a lustful type look. I was just looking in that general direction and she happened to be there. She asked me if I was looking at her and I said yes. You know how you just look at people...it was harmless, but I told her that I was looking at her and that just crushed her. Ever since then, we've had problems. She's know that I've kinda had a thing for women with nice bodies. When we were dating she found some porn on my computer. I used to collect tons of images, but I don't do that anymore. I was an addict and didn't even know I had an addiction. It's something that I still battle with day to day. I don't collect any more images or look at any more porn, but I still find my eyes drifting to look at a women's legs, or breasts or butt. I know this is not good and it does take my attention away from my wife. I'm still very much in love with my wife and sexually and physically attracted to her, but I realize I have contributed to her emotional stresses about losing weight. She thinks she is trying to lose weight for the wrong reason...to please me. I'm not concerned with that. I'm concerned with her emotional and physical well-being as it pertains to her weight. I don't want a supermodel wife. I want a healthly, energetic, confident wife. I know that if she can get over this hurdle, she will have the world at her fingertips, she would be so absolutely full of herself that it would be just great for her. That's the person I know she can be and the person I know she wants to be. We're young and don't even have health insurance yet, and I'd hate for something to happen as a result of her weight that we couldn't get help for. I love her and want her around for a long time. So, what can I do?
