I have been in a relationship with a man, not my H and I thought I was in love with him. He recently became angry with me and slept with another W. I have not been able to let him go and I can't understand why. My H wishes to work our M out and feels we can fall in love again and make this work. He has been very supportive of me and helped me to cope with my recent situation. Story is my H and I have not been together in a couple years because he was verbally abusive and emotionally abusive and never dependable or responsible. He now has a job for the last 2 yrs and has gotten help and says he is a new man and loves me and the children and wishes to prove himself. I love a man I can't have and yet I believe my H has changed and would be a good man and has learned what responsibility is. Do I pursue putting my marriage back together or do I go beg this other man and apologize for making him mad and try to start the relationship with him over?

depwo:

Well, first you posted 2 the wrong 4um, unless you're really young...

But, 2 answer your 2uestions: Give up this OM of yours and take a whack at rebuilding your M. If that doesn't work out, get a DV before getting involved with another man. The one you "angered" is NOT WORTH trying 2 reconcile with. You already know that he's a liar and a cheat (so are you) and you need 2 realize that your R with him was not real, it was a fantasy. You can improve yourself, you may be able 2 restore your M, but you'll subject yourself 2 more of the same if you try 2 work it out with your OM.

all my best,

I agree with 2long--give up OM and give your M another chance.

I was a WS and count my blessings every day that H was willing to forgive me. Forgiveness opens incredible doors. Please walk through them and walk AWAY from OM. He will never be worth it.

First of all, you should NEVER have to beg a man if he shows his anger by sleeping with another woman. He obviously isn't seriously committed to you anyway. You have a history with your husband, and if your heart is telling you to work things out, do that. Don't get caught up in the freshness of a new relationship. The grass may seem greener, but more than likely it's not. Give your hubby a chance, but don't welcome him into your world completely, all at once. He HAS to prove himself. If he messes up again, then you have to decide from there what to do. If you love him, do your best to try and make it work. If everything goes well, you'll be happy you did.