I'm happily married. I'm looking for brainstorming for my son and girlfriend. I don't like giving advise but if they ask me, I'll like to guide them, giving them choices on how to look at a problem in diffent ways.
My son (33), has some emotional problems caused by his father's divorce to me, when he was eight. For years, we went through Family Counseling, and he grew up to be a great human being, highly educated, professional. At his age now, things are surfacing that are causing him relationship problems.
His girlfriend (36) comes from a real dysfunctional family; alcoholics, abusers, felons, etc. She's never had professional counseling. She says that she's a daddy's girl and that she loves my son because he reminds her of her father (the abuser, alcoholic). Her mother ran off with with diffent men, as long as they had money. She was raised mostly by her grandparents. My son's father was also an abuser and alcoholic, but my son was raised my me and my family. This girl almost takes pride in saying that my son must be like his Dad; an alpha guy or bad guy. I did not raised my son to be a bad guy at all and he's nothing at all like his Dad. I've asked her, if my son is a bad guy, why do you want to marry him? Aren't you setting yourself up for abuse and heartbreak? She said, but I like that he's like my Dad. I told her that my family needs to meet her family. So far she has plenty of excuses. If she's the one for my son, I can only say...good luck, God Bless.
By-the-way, my son an Attorney, financially well. Since this girl mentioned that her mother only likes rich guys, I keep wondering what type of trap she has set up for my son. First time my son dates a woman with no high education. He's old enough to know what's right and wrong. But if he asks me for advise, I want to guide him without intruding on his life nor questioning his judgement. We have great respect for each other. If anybody on this board has any advise for me, I need it.
