I have been married for almost one year now and my husband wants us to spend Christmas with his x-girlfriend's family. Apparently, he grew very close to this family and even considers them his "family" during a time when his real family wasn't really there for him. I do not feel comfortable spending time with this family especially at Christmas. Two of the family members visited us recently for my husband's birthday in August - which I believe was generous on my part. The family members, specifically his x-girlfriend's sisters, are constantly begging him to come visit and make him feel very guilty when he misses something, like a graduation. Sometimes, I feel like I am burdening him by keeping him away from the "family" he cares about most, yet it hurts me that he would even ask me to spend Christmas with them. Comments?

Hi LJ!
It's kind of weird hearing about an ex's family all the time, huh?!!? My husband grew really close with his ex's family while they dated for 2 years. When we got married, they sent us a card and they still send things to us like pics....WITH THE ex girlfriend in them!! I think it was very big on your part to let them visit..that is more than I would do! I've felt like they want my husband and his ex to get back together...maybe that's just my insecurity, I don't know. Did you get along with those 2 family members? Did they tell old stories about him and his ex? (that would be crossing the line) Is the ex going to be there for Christmas? I guess what it comes down to is how secure you are. I can understand how it's uncomfortable because it's your husbands ex but he may not even look at it that way. To him,he may innocently look at it as the people that have been there for him.....like family. I would base your descion on what you feel would be good for your relationship. Is this super important to him? Would he possibly hold it against you if you didn't want to go? Would you resent him for making you hang out with his ex's family?
My husband and I have been going through rough times and I'm beginning to learn that sometimes I just have to suck things up that bother me because it makes him happy. And I expect the same in return. In replying to you, I think I'm swaying myself to go to the ex's for Christmas...when I began writing this, I was against it!! Let me know what you decide to do...I hope I helped!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />