My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years. We were friends for many years before we were married, best friends actually. We had many problems coming into the marriage, alot having to do with his financial management but mostly with his lack of communication. We would have talks for hours about how he ignored my emotional needs, never told me how he was feeling, etc. By the end of these marathon talks, I really thought we had gotten somewhere. He was raised in a very emotionally-distant household and I really believed that we both just need to work together to break down his brick wall. He is a good man, a good Christian and someone that I admire in many ways.
As our marriage as continued I really thought we were making great strides, not only with him, but with my own emotional issues. But it seems like were always in a cycle...he's great for a few weeks and then we plummet. He stops talking to me, hides little things from me and becomes emotionally distant. He knows he does it, he knows why, he knows where it comes from, knows it hurts me and OUR marriage...but still..he does it.
I feel completely alone and feel like I have done everything (even counseling with a professional and our pastor) to try and help him to learn to open up. I dont want to force it, i know things take time. But its clear we have made absolutely NO progress. He continually does this, over and over and over again. Its maddening. I feel stupid, like there's something about me that keeps him from opening up. Ive become paranoid, wondering what he's thinking, what he's doing, everything. Im alone and confused. We're great as friends but its become clear that we just cant be married.
Any advice?
