More of a short story than a poem.<P>Our story began over a decade ago on a bright sunny afternoon of a warm summer day. Although we had met several weeks earlier it wasn’t until that beautiful day that fate brought us together. We began the day when I picked her up from her home. I had chose to bring a flower as it was customary to give a lady flowers on the first date. She showed up several minutes later looking as beautiful as the morning sunrise, taking all my breath away. I was very nervous and butterflies were fluttering freely within me. As we drove, I found it very hard to concentrate on the road. <P> We had arrived early to the picture show and decided to spend our time at a local café. While our conversations consist of many topics, I can only recall how I thought her eyes were the most beautiful I had ever seen. Her hair was long and hung freely. Years later when she would cut that beautiful mane, oh how I would miss it so.<P> When we finally got to the theater some time later, she shivered at the cold. I offered my coat to keep her warm. She took it and I never let on how I froze to keep her warm. While the movie played I kept wondering how I would be able to hold her hand. My chance came when she reached down to adjust her shoes. I threw caution to the wind and took her hand in mine. Not now nor ever have I found another to bring so much rapture as I held her hand in mine. When the movie ended I kept those fingers clasped within mine for as long as I could. I would not let go til now. <P> Over the next few years our love continued to grow even when the occasional storm blew our way. But love gave us a haven from the storms and sheltered us throughout the years. We moved through life enjoying the days and loved one another during the nights. We share so many wonderful moments and yet all good things do end. I had never thought that our love could grow cold and fade away. It was not possible that something could ever change that and yet the impossible happens when one least expects it to. I asked myself these days were the 10 years of happiness worth the pain that we now bear worth it. Love is a funny thing, it can bring so much happiness, joy, and bliss and yet it can also bring as much misery and despair. I remember a friend once told me seasons change, how true those words are when they do.<P> What does one do when love can not keep the storms at bay. When love leaves and the bed that you once shared is empty. Do you, can you turn and leave even when staying only brings further pain. How strong is my heart I do not know. I tell myself that it is over and yet I still remain. I tell myself that it doesn’t matter but I cannot say if that is the truth. I continue to search for the answers even if one doesn’t exist.<BR> <P> Fate has weaved this web and now I am entangled. I seek to find what love has taken. As each day passes another strand from the web is broken. Do I tear all the strings and begin again, or do I attempt to mend what we have broken, when does one give up if ever. I realize that the web that we have woven can only be whole again if we both work together, for I cannot do this alone. I can only do so much by myself and each day another end breaks from the whole. How many strands must break before the core is lost, I do not know. If the web is lost what does one do? <P> People say that you’re suppose to move on and begin again. But how can you do that when the strings of the past continues to pull you back. Can you just look to the past and keep only the happy moments. Remembering only the birthdays and vacations, or do you live without the memories. Forgetting everything from that first moment that made your heart skip. The first time she tells you she loves you. The first time you made love. How do you forget sleeping with the pillow that she laid upon just hours after she has left.<P> Maybe like love, each passing day the memory will fade and a new memory will take it’s place. But when you’re lying in your bed in later years, will those memory come rushing back to take hold again. I have always looked to the future but now the future only frightens me. It’s the past that keeps me moving forward, funny how that happened. I always kept my focus on the tomorrow’s but it’s the yesterday’s that is sustaining me now. Life sure knows how to throw curve balls at you when you think that everything is going straight.<P> Sometimes I feel like I’m in the middle of a great big ocean, floating along on a raft. Storms continue to grow around me, pushing me and the raft in all directions. Occasionally I think I see land but it is only a mirage and my heart sinks a little deeper. Day after day I float along, never knowing when shelter will be found. My only thought is somewhere beyond the deep blue sea, there is a place where my weary soul can rest. A place where the sun is shining and the air is warm, just like it was then all those years ago.<P><BR>

Souless, there is One who can calm the storm and heal the damage left in the storm's trace. There are many here who are so willing to listen and try to support you emotionally.<P>Thank you for sharing your story so creatively. So sorry for your pain. Keep "paddling"---the warm refuge will be found in time.<P>Hugs, <P>------------------<BR>Fresh Start

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by freshstart:<BR><B>Souless, there is One who can calm the storm and heal the damage left in the storm's trace. There are many here who are so willing to listen and try to support you emotionally.<P>Thank you for sharing your story so creatively. So sorry for your pain. Keep "paddling"---the warm refuge will be found in time.<P>Hugs, <P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Maybe someday soon I will hear the sirens song that will lead me back to shore. In the mean time, I've been very blessed with a beautiful 2 year old who makes it possible for me to get up each day. Thank you so much for your kind words, I hope that life will smile upon you and shower you with eternal happiness.

Souless, I cannot believe how good "Life" is to me, such an undeserving one.<P>Aren't children the greatest gift? 2 years old is such a fun time in so many ways. If only we could package their energy and keep it in storage for adult life--lol<P>You will hear that song again, I'm sure. Are you and W still together? Sorry I should likely write you from a different forum but being a poet I love to come visit this one!<P>Blessings!