I believe things are getting better between my wife and I but during a recent counselling session she reveiled to me that one of her reasons for growing out of love with me was because I was "abusing" her she did not use the word abuse neither the counselor but it is what I see as abuse. i was forcing sex on her when she did not want it by making her have intercourse with me when she did not want to . I did this by sneaking in when she was asleep and begining when she did not realize it and then she would just comply. I look back and I am so disgusted with myself, I was so self centered and I was unaware of how this reminded her of her past and how it reminded of sexual abuse she suffered. I want her to give us a second chance because I really did not know what pain I was causing and I am more sorry than I have ever been. I hate people like myself who do such terrible thingsto such people . Her only real outcry was an affair she just had , she had one early in the marriage but i believe that one was out of sheer confusion and I forgave her for that a couple of years ago. I have also forgiven her for the most recent one but it still hurts and I deserve it. I wish she would hurt me back but then I wish she was in Love with me again. I am confused, depressed, and I am getting ready to leave for 6 months due to my military career. Please pray that this time will heal the wounds between us and that God will give us the chance to work it out. The only this is gonna work is if he has total control of this.<BR>I am truly afraid that my actions are going to cause her to lose not only her affection for me but also cause her to distance herself from God. i could never forgive myself for that. <BR>I Pray for you all and thank you for your prayers. I will look for your Usernames in Heaven.<BR>In His Love<BR>Lowestpoint

Dear Lord,<P>Please help lowestpoint and his wife get back on the road to rebuiling their marriage. Please help them commit to the time, energy, and pain it may cause, and allow them to see that it is the best thing they can do for themselves right now.<P>Please help lowestpoint get some help while he is away for the next few months in order for him to realize why he did some of the things he did, and that not everything wrong in his marriage was his fault and responsibility.<P>We ask this in the name of the Lord,<P>Amen

Lowestpoint...<BR>You are in my thoughts and prayers!<P>------------------<BR>Stac<BR>AKA/Jaded Heart<BR>~~~~~~~~~~~<BR> <A HREF="http://reflect.to/journeys" TARGET=_blank>http://reflect.to/journeys</A>

Lowestpoint,<P>I don't know if this is the correct place to respond or if I'm just supposed to support you with a prayer.<P>Anyway, did you ever forbid your wife to tell you how she felt or ignore her if she did? If the answer is no stop beating yourself up. I was never abused as a child but my husband acted in a similar way. He would never go to bed at the same time I did or spend much time doing things with me in the evening and then wake me at 3 or 4 in the morning wanting sex. He would pester me endlessly about it. I never told him how used it made me feel and he never told me how it made him feel rejected. We don't know how other people feel unless they tell us. <P>It sounds like your wife has some issues she needs to work out that don't have to do with you. Tell her how you feel and that your sorry you didn't understand. Tell her that you want to help in anyway that you can and then do it. It may take a long time but I think that a steadfast love will help her. <P>I'll say a pray for the two of you.