H moved out 3 months ago. I found out 3 1/2 months ago about OW. (in my choir at church)<P>He claims to care deeply for me in every way, but he doesn't want to be my H.<P>Our last time together was at lunch one day. We had a wonderful time. the D was not mentioned. We really talked for the first time in a long time without mentioning problems of life, etc. <P>For a brief moment, H's expression changed. Became very handsome, more so than usual. And sort of remote. Gave me very eerie feeling.<P>When I first had talk with H about the affair, he said a year ago he felt so close to the Lord it seemed he could reach out and touch him at times. I encouraged him to move back, that the Lord had not moved from him.<P>I really believe that the devil has his grip on all betrayers. Christian or not, but esp. where Christian service is present. Many people in the church have expressed disappointment as they looked up to H as a spiritual leader. I mentioned that to him, but it made no difference.<P>I think we all need to pray that all our spouses and their OPS turn to the Lord. I am particularly praying that the Lord will block their relationship growth and cause it to die. <P>This is my request. He has negotiated well, and we have asked mutual church friend, an atty, to do paperwork without charging fees, only filing fees. In the interest of saving what positive feelings are left in H, I agreed, perhaps in a weak moment. I know there have been marriages restored even following D. Of course, I only want God's will, but I believe His will is for marriages to stay together.<P>Join me in this prayer for all of us.<P>Committed

I feel the same way you do that Satan has his grip on betrayers. But we as Christians have all authority over the enemy bought by the blood of Jesus Christ who has the victory. Several of us on the Women's Bible Study pray a prayer for a loved one in bondage and have seen the results of God's work. <P>I have begun reading a book called "How God Can and Will Save Your Marriage" by Erin Thiele and am amazed at how much more I have discovered that I have been doing wrong. The Power of A Praying Wife opened my eyes greatly, now this book has too. God is so awesome!<P>Dear Heavenly Father, thank You Lord for the blessings You have given us. We thank You Lord for your saving grace. We praise You Lord, for you are the Almighty God, all Glory is Yours. I pray Lord that The Holy Spirit will envelop Committed, giving her the peace that passes all understanding. Let her feel Your presence each day. Guide her during this trial. I pray that the Holy Spirit lays conviction upon Committed's husband's heart, bringing him to his knees before You in repentance. Show him Lord that it is the enemy that is controlling him, filling him with lust for the OW. I pray that the seeds of discord will be sown between the OW and Committed's husband, and that the OW will be confounded and exposed. Let OW and Committed's husband's time together be filled with angy words and strife. Let Committed's husband see her in Your perspective, filling his heart and soul with love and desire for his wife and only her. I praise You Lord for the victory that we claim in this marriage. Bring this husband home soon. Thank You Lord, In Jesus name I pray, AMEN

Alcoholic's Wife,<P>Thanks so much for the response and prayer. I've continued praying in this vein and will continue to do so.<P>An update--I need to get rid of the topic title. It needs to have more positive emphasis. I also have been reading Erin Thiele's book. Have been listening to tape of book in car as my job is quite mobile.<P>H and OW are away for the weekend. It's a terrible feeling to have the one you love and trusted off with another. It feels so like I am basically worthless. Of course, as a Christian, I know better. My human feelings just get in the way sometimes. I will look for the other book you mentioned. <P>H said he would call Tuesday, that we need to talk. I fear he will push again. According to what I understand from the book, I need to cooperate and do as he asks...<P>this is so hard.....yet not even as hard as what Christ went through, I know.<P>Prayers for you as well.<BR>thank you so much.<P>Committed

Committed, I'm sorry I didn't get to read your post sooner. I will be praying for you and your husband today. God bless,<BR>AW