I feel completely defeated and lost right now. My husband told me tonight that he pretty much hates me, that I'm psycho for even caring and "pursuing" him because he doesn't want to be with me and will NEVER be with me. No matter what. I told him I may be pregnant (I'm 3 weeks late) and he said he'd rather shoot himself in the head than have anything to do with me, anyway.<BR>If you can pray for me I'd appreciate it, thuogh it seems that all the prayers in the world can't help me now. I am strong and will eventually be okay but I just...I just love him. I can't handle this. I want to go hold him right now (he's snoozing on a chair) and I know he will push me away.<BR>He may even hit me.<BR>Please, God, help me here. I am losing faith and don;t know if there's anything I can do any more. He said he was glad to be rid of me and that he can't wait until I'm gone.<BR>I'm sorry to post so much, this is just a very hard time for me and I don;t know where else to turn.<BR>I am afraid he is telling the truth. I am so scared to lose him, I wanted to be with him forever and now this just feels like a bad dream.<BR>Help, God, please give me a miracle.

I'm not good at writing prayers like some of the other women, but just wanted to let you know I'll be praying for you. God Bless.

My prayers are with you. Please protect your unborn child. Do not let him hit you. God will see you throuth this.

ani, I will be praying for you also. Dear sister, try not to let his words hurt you. It is not your husband who is attacking you, it is Satan, attacking you through your husband. Resist Satan and he will flee. When your husband glares at you with that hateful look (I would get that look all the time too from my H), silently pray a quick prayer for the Lord to overwhelm your H and soften his heart, and rebuke Satan in the name of Jesus. Praise Jesus out loud. Satan flees when you praise the Lord.<P>Lord, I lift up ani to You, asking for your peace and comfort to descend upon her. Lord, please help her deflect the attacks of the enemy and show her how to resist him and make him flee. Father God, I praise You in the highest, Jesus is the name above all names. In our precious Savior's name I pray, AMEN

AMEN

I am praying for you, Ani.<P>Please try and be strong. Please pray and tell the Lord how much you love Him and trust He will guide you thru this. He loves you very much and will see you thru this , Hon.<P>Be well and take care of yourself. You can make it thru this, you're just in the midst of the storm right now, time is key!<P>God Bless you.<BR>Jo

ani, this may sound a bit off but it really works...<P>the bible says be thankful in all things. You should praise and thank God for your husband acting this way and pray that His will shines through in this situation. Satan cannot stand it when we are thankful for circumstances that would debilitate us. His grip will loosen if you remain thankful and praise the Lord even when things are the darkest. Please try it even if it sounds crazy. You will find yourself suddenly at peace. In the meantime, I will pray for you and your H.

Starry-eyed is right ani. The best defense against the enemy is Praise and Worship of our Lord Jesus Christ. Thank you for posting this Starry-eyed. I need to do so praise and worship over my situation right now!

Dear Heavenly Father I thank you more and more each day for this site. It makes me aware that I am not the only one who feels the way I do, or faces the same trials as I do. I hear the pain in ani's post. I know much of what she feels and is experiencing. I know that the wonderful people here will be a source of inspiration to her as they have been to me. I thank YOU for guiding me to this site. I thank you for these incredible children of GOD who can minister to us so effectively. <BR>I pray that YOU will be with Ani,prtect her with your love and your strength. I pray that you will drive the demons of rage and hatred from the heart of her husband. The bible commands Husbands, love your wifes as you would love yourself for such is the way Christ loves HIS church. Father, show him that he is dishonoring not only himself but also his wife and YOU when he strikes her without provocation. I pray that you will bring him to his knees before the cross and show him the errors and sin in his heart. Protect ani and her unborn child and cause the devil to flee from this family. In the name of Jesus, I stand in the gap for this family. I am now and intercessor and claim the power of almighty GOD to remove the power of the devil in their house and lives. In the name of Jesus, I COMMAND satan to flee from their lives and to restore everything he has taken from them seven fold. I pray that ani will lay her burdens at your feet and know that YOU are fighting for her. In the name of Jesus I command the demons of hatred, rage, bitterness and indifference to be cast from her husbands heart. Bring him to the cross and show him that he made vows to her and to YOU and show him the love and the things in glory that await him if he follows YOUR perfect will. In the name of Jesus I claim the miracles of healing and restoration in thie family and pray that the Holy Spirit will descend upon them like rain, showering them both with YOUR love and protection. I thank you for hearing her cries and these prayers. I praise YOU for the miracles you are granting and will continue to bless this family with. Lead them. teach them. Show them that YOU are restoring this family. All these things I ask and claim in the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ, the precious Lamb of GOD<BR>Amen and Amen

Thank you everyone for your prayers. He's agreed to counseling, I go for the final blood test tomorrow. <BR>He seems happy now that I am pregnant, but isn't showing it when othedrs are present, still distant etc. But at least he will go to counseling with me.<BR>I thank God for bringing me here. Without the sanity and knowledge I found here in the articless and posts I would have been lost and so terrified. It is good to know that others have been through this and survived, and that there are people who take their commitment seriously. Thank you, I am praying for everybody here today. <BR>I am praying for tigger especially.<BR>For myself I just keep praying that he will be honest anfd committed, that this will not pass not matter what, that he can live up to the promises he is making. I don't want to lose him or myself in the process. <BR>Thank you God for bringing me this far.

Thanks for the prayers. My prayers are with you also. Having a baby is such a blessed thing. God works his miracles in alot of different ways this might be his way. Is this your first child? I know my H doesnt show his affection to me in front of people I think that it is that pride thing.<P>Michelle

don't worry you can get through this.my sister and law is going through the same thing.all you need is someone to be there that you can talk to.and don't let him hurt you.show him your a strong person and that you can go on even though you don't want to.if you ever want to talk email me at christys@penn.com

Ani, you might hate me for saying this, but that is a chance I am willing to take, since I love you. I say what I say with Ezekial 3:17-21 as my base. I desperately hope you will change a big part of your MarBldg profile...a part that I hate. I hate it with the blessing of the 1st part of Romans 12:9. I hope you begin to hate tattooing the same way that I do. If you wonder why I say this, read Leviticus 18:28, and may the Lord change your heart. Godd bless you. I have faith that if you accept and believe what I have written, your life will get better, not worse.<P>-Steve

Hi. I am sorry that you do not like my profession, but it is not what it used to be (a mark of anbtisocial feeling or behavior.) I try to be artistic and show the soul of the wearer of the tattoo, if you ccould see the way my artwork is done you migth feel differently. <BR>In the early days of Christianity, the Picts (where we get the word picture) used tattoos as a way to show their faith and commit to it. I view tattoos as a way to express a concept or soulful feeling that should last a whole life long.<BR>If you see a lot of work it is very shallow and fleshly-I don't create that kind of artwork. If you want I could post some work to you, somehow...I try to make people think about what they really feel and belive in, before they mark their bodies with my artwork.<BR>I don't do any satanic or racial stuff, and I don't do anything that's been done before (except for a few versions of sacred hearts.)<BR>Thanks for your opinion though. Right now my occupation is the only thing I have to hang on to, the way I can manage to live through this on a practical level.<BR>BTW. I have been praying and trying to be kind and forgiving.<BR>My husband has been out for the last three nights, he says he is out with male frriends but I don't know where he is, or who he's with. I thought I saw ow at our business today, I am scared tonight (he's still out at 2:30) and wishing he'd just come home and be kind, too...<BR>He hasn't been too angry the last day or two but he has been abvoiding me a lot and staying out drinking, etc.<BR>Thanks again, I hope and pray that he comes around and actually goes to counseling with me. I pray that he'd come home and stay home.<BR>That he'd see and understand what is important in life and live up to his promises to me...<BR>Thanks everyone

well he didn't come home tonight.<BR>I'm going to bed now, if I can stop thinkinng long enough to sleep.<BR>Thank you God for sending me to this board...<BR>and thanks everyone.

Heavenly Father, thank You for your unending love, for loving us each and every day. Father, You are our Rock, our Fortress, our Redeemer. I praise You Lord for the work you are doing in ani's life, and her marriage. Father, I pray that what the enemy intended for evil, is turned to good, for Your glory and honor. Thank You Father for speaking to ani's husband's heart. Lord, Your Word tells us You hate divorce, we stand on that covenant for the restoration of this marriage. Thank You Lord for all you do for us. IJN I pray, AMEN

He is gone again tonight. Told me he wants nothing to do with me. When I said goodbye he was sad. I am supposed to leave tomorrow. I am crying all night. He said he would be home maybe but I am just sad...<BR>He gaev me money for my trip, but he also told me he can NOT be with me.<BR>He had condoms in his bag (we never use them) and still said he hadn't had sex with anyone else...yet.<BR>I can't stand to be like this, I am feeling very low and wondering if I am crazy for wanting this man to stay in my life. Maybe I am psycho, I don't know anymore. <BR>Thanks everybody for being here, posting here has helped me and the prayers have made me feel less insane for having hope.

Father in Heaven, please send the Holy Spirit to ani right now, comforting her, giving her an extra measure of Your peace that passes all understanding. Father, our hearts break for her, please heal her broken heart. Lord, I pray that her husband is not lead into temptation, but delivered from evil. Take him back from the enemy Lord, he belongs to You. Help ani Father to trust completely in You, giving herself over to You to heal. Let her be strong in faith, giving glory to You Lord. Let her be fully persuaded that what You have promised, You are able to perform. Thank You Lord, Jesus. We are so humbled by your omnipresence, and love you so much. Thank You dear Lord for hearing our cries. IJN I pray, AMEN.<P>ani, I am so sorry, I wish I was there so I could give you a hug and help you feel better. This will have to suffice {{{{{{ani}}}}}}<P>ani, I'm posting the following verse for you, but just as much for me, as I have grown weary in doing good:<P><B>"Wait on the Lord; be of good courage and He will strengthen thine heart, yes wait on the Lord. But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk and not faint." </B><P>God bless you dear sister. <P>AW

Just offering a correction to Steve's earlier post on tattooing. The reference is actually Leviticus 19:28 which says "Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the Lord."<P>That's all. I was confused about the post until I found the correct chapter/verse.

Thanks everyone for praying. I went away for a wekk and now he seems to have gotten around to being more understanding, wanting to work it out (again) so I'm just praying and waiting.<P>The reference in Leviticus refers to an old old custom, that when someone died the mourners would mark themselves in memory of the dead, to keep their "spirit" as part of the mourner. The Israelites had no other form of tattooing, that was their reason, and the reason was not very good for monotheism (a newer thing at the time) so was prohibited.<BR>If you look up stuff about the picts you'll find some interesting things about tattoos. Also the Crusaders had crosses tattooed on them, so that if they were captured by Muslims they couldn't give in under torture or through human weakness and be converted.<BR>I love showing people that their souls, their beliefs, and their hearts can be shown on the outside as well as the inside. It takes a lot of commitment to mark yourself permanently, more commitment than most people, Christian or otherwise, have nowadays. I respect my clients a lot.<BR>Thank you everyone, I'm praying for everyone here...I pray that A.'s Wife's H stays with her and out of my state (CA) and I'm praying for tigger again...<BR>I pray every day that my husband is sincere this time, that this represents a real effort and isn't going to change.<BR>Thank s again everyone. If you want to talk about tattooing stuff you can email me at resonanteye@hotmail.com because I love to debate on a friendly level-don't flame me though, please. I'm easily scared.