Please pray for my marriage. I have been married for eleven years and we have two wondeful children. My live is falling apart all around me, as my wife tells me that she is not happy anymore. Please pray for encouragement for the both of us... I know that with Gods help, this could be a new beginning and not the end. I work with computers for a living and always have. In order to get my wife more involved with my computer activities, I started teaching her how to use the computer and the Internet. Boy did this ever backfire on me. For the last year she spends more time online than she does with her own family. She is a stay home mom and spends every spare minute online. Whenever I bring up the subject, she gets upset and denies that there is even a problem. She use to work hard to have spare time to spend with the children and myself, but not anymore. As far as I can tell there is no cybersexual relationship involved. She is big into chat rooms, message boards, and online multi player games. My marriage is a wreck and she denies that this has anything to do with it… ARG! I don't know where to start……. I understand that this might be the sysmtom of a deeper problem, but heck I can't get her away from the internet long enough to discuss them. Please pray for the both of us.<P>Thank you & God Bless,<BR>Ran

My prayers are with you. Power of prayer does work.

Hey Tigger,<P>Thank you for your prayers. I feel that I need a miracle from God, and soon. I just came across an anniversary card that my wife had given to me on our seventh anniversary. She signed it "I love you more than anything!!", now tell me how can that love just die. She now tells me that she loves me, but is not in love with me. This is so hard to handle, she shows me NO signs of affection and when I go to hug or kiss her she just turns away. Oh well, I know we each have our own problems and I do not want to burden anyone with mine. We are still living under the same roof, and going to a Christian counselor. All things are possible through Jesus Christ.<P>My Daily Prayer <A HREF="http://www.cyber-1.com/donna" TARGET=_blank>http://www.cyber-1.com/donna</A> <BR>Thank you for the prayers,<BR>RanMan<BR><p>[This message has been edited by ranman (edited September 10, 2000).]

Counceling is a good thing. Hopefully she will see the light. God does not like divorce. My prayers are with you. Thanks for you prayers. They do help.

Hi, Ranman.<P>It might be a good idea to use the Policy of Joint Agreement regarding your wife's use of the Internet. Harley outlines it very nicely on this website somewhere. The key is that *both* you and your wife have to be enthusiastic about the final agreement.<P>If your wife is not familiar with Harley's principles, tread lightly. She may think this is just a new way of you getting your way. It's not - by definition, you *both* have to love the final agreement. Otherwise, you're not done negotiating!<P>Remember - no selfish demands or disrespectful judgements. Listen carefully to what she is saying, and repeat it back to her until you get it right. Then carefully let her know your concerns. My guess is that it probably has something to do with unmet needs you have (Family committment? Domestic support? Conversation?) that she is not meeting because she is online. If she were adequately meeting those needs again, and giving you 15 hours a week of "date" time, then the extra time she spent online wouldn't even be an issue, would it?

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><B>My guess is that it probably has something to do with unmet needs</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I feel that she turned to the Internet because of needs that I was not meeting in her life. Now neither one of our needs are beeing met. I would love to start using the Joint Agreement policy, but I feel it is too soon. She already feels that I want to take away everthing she enjoys, and that is not so. I just want to be second in her life, right after God.<P>Thanx,<BR>Ran