MY HUSBAND RAY LEFT OUR UNION OF MARRIAGE ON MAY 16TH 2000 <BR>FOR 19 YR OLD GIRL. HE IS LIVING WITH HER AND HER DAD, SISTER, & STEP MOM. HE HAS NO RESPONSIBILITIES AT ALL. HE IS <BR>NOT EVEN PAYING THE BILLS HE OWES HE IS JUST LETTING THEM <BR>GET HIGHER AND HIGHER AND WHY NO ONE KNOWS. IT SHOCKED ALL OF OUR FRIENDS WHEN HE LEFT ME. HE HAS TOLD THEM THAT ITS MY PARENTS FAULT AND THAT HE WASN'T HAPPY. BUT THE REALL TRUTH IS THAT HE COMMITTED ADULTRY. I ACTUALY FEEL LIKE I HAVE BEEN RAPED BY THE GIRL. SHE HAS MY HUSBAND OF 5 1/2 YEARS OF MARRIAGE. OUR 6 YR ANNIVERSARY WOULD HAVE BEEN AUG. 6 2000. RAY FILED FOR DIVORCE ON AUG. 3RD. SO FAR WE HAVE ONLY HAD ONE MEETING IN TRYING TO REACH AND AGREEMENT IN THE DIVORCE NOTHING HAPPENED DURING IT THANKS TO GOD. I HAVE NOT HEARD A WORD FROM RAY NOR HAVE I SEEN HIM EXCEPT IN OUR MTG WITH THE LAWYERS. I KNOW WHERE HE IS LIVING, I KNOW WHERE HE IS WORKING, AND OUR MUTUAL FRIENDS SPEAK TO ME FROM TIME TO TIME. THEY ARE NOT THE FRIENDS TO ME LIKE THEY ONCE WERE THOUGH. RAY AND I ARE BOTH CHRISTIANS I ACCEPTED CHRIST DEC. 8, 1978 AND HE STATED TO ME BEFORE WE WERE MARRIED THAT HE IS A CHRISTIAN. WE ARE BOTH MEMBERS OF THE SAME CHURCH AND I AM IN A SEPARATED BUT NOT SEVERED CLASS THERE I'M LOOKING FOR A SUNDAY SCHOOL CLASS THAT I FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH. I GO TO THE PREACHING SERVICES AT 11AM AND 6PM AND MY WED. NITE CLASS. I PRAY EVERY NITE TO GOD THAT HE WILL EVENTUALLY RESTORE OUR MARRIAGE TO WHAT HE WANTS IT TO BE FOR RAY AND I. AND I TALK TO HIM THRUOUT THE DAY TO. I'M NOT ANGRY, I'M JUST IN A DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO STATE RIGHT NOW. I COME TO THIS WEBSITE AND MANY OTHER SITES TO SEE IF THERE IS ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO. IF ANY OF YOU HAVE SUGGESTIONS FOR ME I WOULD GREATLY APPRECIATE THEM. RAY AND I ESPECIALLY NEED ALL THE PRAYERS WE CAN GET. I WANT RAY TO COME BACK AND BE THE CHRISTIAN HUSBAND TO ME THAT GOD WANT HIM TO BE TO ME. AND I'M GONNA BE THE CHRISTIAN WIFE THAT GOD WANTS ME TO BE TO RAY ALSO. PLEASE I DON'T WANT GOD TO LET OUR DIVORCE GO THRU EVER. WOULD YOU PLEASE HELP ME. I NEED TO KNOW WHAT TO DO. I NEED A FRIEND. <BR>THANKS<P>MELANIE<BR>

Dear Melanie,<P>I know how you feel. This is the most painful situation in the world. I'm really sorry that you're in this situation like me and I'll pray for you. You are not responsible for his decisions. If your marriage wasn't perfect, you should try to change those parts of yourself which weren't as "perfect" as you'd like. But you are not responsible for his actions. Keep praying and we will pray with you. Take care.

Agree with above!! I love your perseverance! God will honor that! Keep up the prayers and we're here for you!<BR>Love and respect for sticking through the pain and sin!!<BR>Elisa

Melanie,<BR>WOW. I would say "just hang in there" but that isn't enough. I'm sorry that Ray has it so "good" but this too shall not last. Unfortunately for you, you get left out in the cold. Try this website: Restorem.org (restore ministries). All of us here, want changes in our relationships. Stay with us. I don't know if Ray can call himself a Christian, acting the way he is. I won't bother you with all of the scripture right now. One thing that comes to my mind is that it seems as if you have been distant from trying to pursuade Ray to come home. What is your church's position? I believe it would get his attention if 3 elderes went over to "Ray's" AND CONFRONTED HIM ON HIS BEHAVIOR. If he stays in denial, the can turn him over for satan to deal with him. Since satan is the destroyer, Ray's relationship, and his life, will really fall apart quickly. He may "see the light" quickly. God will bring him to his knees. <BR>I will pray for you. Ted ><>